Championship weekend looms brightly and I'm looking forward to spending Saturday with Brooks drinking excessively, watching the SEC championship (among others), and anxiously awaiting the Titans-Browns showdown in the wonderful city of Nashville.
So, Florabama '08. There will be mullets, there will be jorts, but most importantly, in the immortal words of Dan Dierdorff, "These two teams are playing football today."
Saturday was a rough day. I was in the car returning from a trip to Savannah. A ride in which I spent most of my time cycling through AM channels trying to home in on an Iron Bowl broadcast. I lucked out and picked up the Auburn sports network. I almost feel bad for them. They started their broadcast with such high hopes and a determined effort. By the time I lost the signal north of Atlanta midway through the 3rd quarter the broadcast became almost comical. I know they're catering to a specific demographic, but they'd spend 5 minute analyzing a Kody Burns incomplete pass, when on the flipside, you'd get, "Coffee, runs right..........touchdown." I assumed they were on the goaline. You can imagine my delight when I later tuned to Sirius sports radio and discovered it was a 43 yard run.
Anyway, I digress. I'm ecstatic. The first victory over Auburn in 7 years, the first victory over Auburn ever in Bryant-Denny Stadium, the first shut out of Auburn in 16 years, but more importantly, a clear display of a dominant defense (albeit against a sub-par offense), and an outstanding display of offense against a good all-around SEC defence, especially on the ground. I was happy to see Saban feeling good about beating Auburn, because let's face it, that was really his only true goal at the beginning of the season. The fact that he's leading an undefeated team with a shot at a national title is a welcome bonus. Coach of the Year?? Thoughts??? I think it's a given.
I think Saturday's game is going to be amazing. There are so many what-if's at large that no one can accurately predict what's going to happen. You could look at each teams ratings, but if you based a decision solely on them, Alabama should still be 25th and Georgia should be walking into the title game. Tech what what?? The media wastes no time touting Florida's offense, but have they played any teams with truly effective defences lately? LSU is about the only defence I can think of that stood any chance. I don't know how the minds-at-be could pierce the Himalayic defensive power the Citadel could muster.
I'm very anxious to see how the Gators play against Bama's tight secondary and I'd especially love to see good ol' Mount Cody give Tebow a nice hug. By the way, Cody running block from halfback against Auburn, was probably one of the most hilarious things I've ever seen. Well played sir!
I digress yet again. Florida's defence is solid, but does have holes which can be exploited by Bama's ground attack. John Parker Wilson doesn't always get the ball where it needs to go, but he does have pocket presence, discipline, and an outstanding O-Line. I also haven't seen him cry after throwing a pick-6 (I'm looking at you, Tebow). Not to completely knock Tebow. Bama has shown some weakness at dealing with athletic, mobile quarterbacks and that could very well make all the difference.
Bama's going in as the underdog and that's exactly the way they like it. They were underdogs against Clemson, Georgia, and even LSU. It's the situation Saban thrives on and I think his team responds to it as well. I can say one thing with certainty and a clear conscience.
At least we didn't lose to Ole Miss.
On another note: Say what you want about Phil Fulmer, I think that was one of the most well-deserved wins of his career and he earned his ride off the field on the shoulders of his players (cue fat jokes). He's a classy coach and it will be strange to picture the Volunteers without him at the helm. It's strange to say, but we'll miss you Phil!
Sunday, November 30, 2008
College Football's Best Rivalries
Ahh, the joys of rivalry week: the fans, the mascots, the unadulterated drunken debauchery between co-eds just exiting their sexual peak. It is truly a magical time in the fall. I’ve already tried to define what makes a rivalry great (if by some chance you missed that gem, feel free to click here), so now it is time to reflect on what the greatest rivalries are in college football.
Here are, in ascending order, the unquestioned ranking of the five best rivalries in college football.
5. Texas-Oklahoma
Why It’s A Great Rivalry: Two storied programs? Check. Two teams consistently playing for BCS bowl berths? Check. Cool nickname for the match up? Red River Shootout (Suck it, PC Police, we use old school names here). Check. A storied rivalry? Played 98 times between 1900 and 2008, so check and check.
Cool Fact about the rivalry: In 1976, UT Coach Darrell Royal and OU Coach Barry Switzer were involved in such a huge feud, that when President Ford attended the rivalry and asked to meet both head coaches, the two coaches would only talk to the President and not each other.
Why it’s not the best rivalry: Three big problems with this matchup. First of all, they award a trophy to the winner of each game. It’s called the Ten Gallon Hat, and spoiler alert, it’s a giant golden hat. Give me a break, if you need to come up with a crappy trophy to get people excited about your game, it’s not a great epic rivalry. Second, it’s played at a neutral site. This is total crap. Great rivalries are played in front of tremendously hostile crowds, not some amicably divided stadium.
Third, and most importantly, they are not each other’s only rival! Texas also claims that A&M is their rival, OU also has the “Bedlam Battle” against Oklahoma State. It seems that this rivalry only really matters to the fans when both teams are good. Not acceptable.
4. Harvard-Yale
Why is this a great rivalry? First of all, the rivalry has a nickname. This is always a huge plus for any rivalry. If your hatred for the other school is so intense that you cannot even refer to the other team by name, then you got something going on there. In this case, it is the simple nickname of “The Game.” Obviously, with this nickname, they fit criteria number one. They have played over 125 times making it the second longest rivalry in college sports, they were the first intercollegiate football game, not to mention Mr. Burns has made several references to his hatred for the Crimson on the Simpsons, all of which makes it a great rivalry.
Other cool fact: The Game was so violent in 1894, that the two schools suspended play and President Teddy “I Shoot All Kinds of Crazy Shit” Roosevelt actually considered outlawing the sport entirely.
Why it’s not the best rivalry: Umm, it’s the Ivy League. Not a BCS conference, not the Mountain West, not even good enough for the 1-AA playoffs. Also, since these alums go to the opposition for graduate school, the hatred must be limited to a “grudging respect.”
3. Auburn-Alabama
Why It’s a Great Rivalry: It is without question the best rivalry in an entire region—no other battle in the South can get close to this game. It has the cross state rivalry aspect to it, which is always intense. It is also historically a very even battle, with Auburn having won 33 times and Alabama 38 times. You also have one of college footballs most iconic figures involved with Coach Bear Bryant, which gives the game a timeless element. I’ll also quote Logs, a Bama alum, about the game: “It's a great dynamic because they're in the same state and same conference. I've never seen two schools hate each other as much as these two. It's really overlooked in the media, especially recently since the Saban-LSU dynamic has created a rivalry of it's own. There is definitely a rivalry between LSU and Alabama, but the hatred probably lies mainly with the LSU fans. Growing up in Tennessee, you hear about nothing except the Tennessee Alabama game, but upon going to Bama for grad school, I was amazed at how the fans don't like Tennessee, but absolutely hate Auburn.”
Rivalry cool fact: The two schools suspended the rivalry from 1907-1948, and it actually took the Alabama State Legislature to pass a referendum to convince the two schools to bring the rivalry back.
Why It’s Not the Best Rivalry: First of all, they foolishly put the game at a neutral site for 40 years after they brought the game back in 1948. Putting the game in Birmingham might have given the matchup it’s a great title, but it hurts in the rivalry ratings system. Second, this has historically not been a matchup of national title contenders. Alabama is, historically, the greatest football program in the South. They’ve won 12 National Titles, 21 SEC Titles, and have the 7th most wins of any Division 1 program. Auburn, on the other hand, has only one National Title (1957, so back when Commies were a threat), and have only 6 SEC Titles. Really, Auburn only became a good football school when Pat Dye came to the school in the 1980s. So, while it’s a great rivalry, it’s not the greatest rivalry.
2. Army-Navy
Why It’s A Great Rivalry: Umm, let’s put it this way. In what other rivalry do the President’s of both schools actually require attendance by the entire student body? That’s intense. Some other reason that this rivalry is great:
- The President of the United States comes
- The pageantry of both student bodies processing into the stadium
- Both teams cheers actually are not only about them, but also their opponent. You don’t just say “Go Army,” by itself, you have to include “Beat Navy.”
- Every weight plate in the Navy weight room actually says “Beat Army” on it
- Evenly matched, with Navy having a 52-49 advantage
- Players on both sides are not only trained in killing human beings, but they also have government sanctions to use these skills.
Finally, what’s really cool about this game is that usually it’s the last game of the year for both teams. These are not bowl-bound teams normally, so this game really becomes the bowl game for each team.
Cool Fact about the Rivalry: Instant replay debuted in this game in 1963.
Why It’s Not the Best Rivalry: Many people will focus on the talent on this issue, but not me, I think that the history and pageantry more than make up for the lack of All-Americans. My problem with this matchup is what happens after the game ends. At the conclusion of the game, both teams go out into the middle of the field and sing each other’s alma maters together. Are you kidding me?!?! I never knew trained assassins could be such pussies. Way too much respect for your opponent to be the best rivalry, in my infallible opinion.
1. Michigan-Ohio State
Why It’s the Best Rivalry: Two of the most storied programs in the nation are involved in this annual bloodbath. Between them, they have won 18 National Titles and 77 Big Ten Titles. On 23 different occasions, the game has decided which of the two teams would win the Big 10 title, so it is more or less the Big 10 Title Game year after year. They have played 105 times and didn’t even pause during World War II. Sorry, Nazis, but we’ve got a game to play. They have two of the greatest coaches on either side in Bo Schembechler and Woody Hayes, whose rivalry was so intense that they called their matchup the “Ten Year War.”
Fun Fact: When Woody Hayes questioned by the media why he went for 2 in the fourth quarter of the 1968 game despite having a 50-14 lead, Hayes responded, “Because I couldn’t go for three.” Wow.
Why It’s Not: From 1835 to 1836, the state of Michigan and the state of Ohio waged war over the territory surrounding Toledo, Ohio. The Game is considered to simply be a continuation of this war. So this game is actually based on a literal war. Wait, does this only further prove that it’s the best rivalry in college football? This matchup dominates the competition
Here are, in ascending order, the unquestioned ranking of the five best rivalries in college football.
5. Texas-Oklahoma
Why It’s A Great Rivalry: Two storied programs? Check. Two teams consistently playing for BCS bowl berths? Check. Cool nickname for the match up? Red River Shootout (Suck it, PC Police, we use old school names here). Check. A storied rivalry? Played 98 times between 1900 and 2008, so check and check.Cool Fact about the rivalry: In 1976, UT Coach Darrell Royal and OU Coach Barry Switzer were involved in such a huge feud, that when President Ford attended the rivalry and asked to meet both head coaches, the two coaches would only talk to the President and not each other.
Why it’s not the best rivalry: Three big problems with this matchup. First of all, they award a trophy to the winner of each game. It’s called the Ten Gallon Hat, and spoiler alert, it’s a giant golden hat. Give me a break, if you need to come up with a crappy trophy to get people excited about your game, it’s not a great epic rivalry. Second, it’s played at a neutral site. This is total crap. Great rivalries are played in front of tremendously hostile crowds, not some amicably divided stadium.
Third, and most importantly, they are not each other’s only rival! Texas also claims that A&M is their rival, OU also has the “Bedlam Battle” against Oklahoma State. It seems that this rivalry only really matters to the fans when both teams are good. Not acceptable.
4. Harvard-Yale
Why is this a great rivalry? First of all, the rivalry has a nickname. This is always a huge plus for any rivalry. If your hatred for the other school is so intense that you cannot even refer to the other team by name, then you got something going on there. In this case, it is the simple nickname of “The Game.” Obviously, with this nickname, they fit criteria number one. They have played over 125 times making it the second longest rivalry in college sports, they were the first intercollegiate football game, not to mention Mr. Burns has made several references to his hatred for the Crimson on the Simpsons, all of which makes it a great rivalry.Other cool fact: The Game was so violent in 1894, that the two schools suspended play and President Teddy “I Shoot All Kinds of Crazy Shit” Roosevelt actually considered outlawing the sport entirely.
Why it’s not the best rivalry: Umm, it’s the Ivy League. Not a BCS conference, not the Mountain West, not even good enough for the 1-AA playoffs. Also, since these alums go to the opposition for graduate school, the hatred must be limited to a “grudging respect.”
3. Auburn-Alabama
Why It’s a Great Rivalry: It is without question the best rivalry in an entire region—no other battle in the South can get close to this game. It has the cross state rivalry aspect to it, which is always intense. It is also historically a very even battle, with Auburn having won 33 times and Alabama 38 times. You also have one of college footballs most iconic figures involved with Coach Bear Bryant, which gives the game a timeless element. I’ll also quote Logs, a Bama alum, about the game: “It's a great dynamic because they're in the same state and same conference. I've never seen two schools hate each other as much as these two. It's really overlooked in the media, especially recently since the Saban-LSU dynamic has created a rivalry of it's own. There is definitely a rivalry between LSU and Alabama, but the hatred probably lies mainly with the LSU fans. Growing up in Tennessee, you hear about nothing except the Tennessee Alabama game, but upon going to Bama for grad school, I was amazed at how the fans don't like Tennessee, but absolutely hate Auburn.”Rivalry cool fact: The two schools suspended the rivalry from 1907-1948, and it actually took the Alabama State Legislature to pass a referendum to convince the two schools to bring the rivalry back.
Why It’s Not the Best Rivalry: First of all, they foolishly put the game at a neutral site for 40 years after they brought the game back in 1948. Putting the game in Birmingham might have given the matchup it’s a great title, but it hurts in the rivalry ratings system. Second, this has historically not been a matchup of national title contenders. Alabama is, historically, the greatest football program in the South. They’ve won 12 National Titles, 21 SEC Titles, and have the 7th most wins of any Division 1 program. Auburn, on the other hand, has only one National Title (1957, so back when Commies were a threat), and have only 6 SEC Titles. Really, Auburn only became a good football school when Pat Dye came to the school in the 1980s. So, while it’s a great rivalry, it’s not the greatest rivalry.
2. Army-Navy
Why It’s A Great Rivalry: Umm, let’s put it this way. In what other rivalry do the President’s of both schools actually require attendance by the entire student body? That’s intense. Some other reason that this rivalry is great:- The President of the United States comes
- The pageantry of both student bodies processing into the stadium
- Both teams cheers actually are not only about them, but also their opponent. You don’t just say “Go Army,” by itself, you have to include “Beat Navy.”
- Every weight plate in the Navy weight room actually says “Beat Army” on it
- Evenly matched, with Navy having a 52-49 advantage
- Players on both sides are not only trained in killing human beings, but they also have government sanctions to use these skills.
Finally, what’s really cool about this game is that usually it’s the last game of the year for both teams. These are not bowl-bound teams normally, so this game really becomes the bowl game for each team.
Cool Fact about the Rivalry: Instant replay debuted in this game in 1963.
Why It’s Not the Best Rivalry: Many people will focus on the talent on this issue, but not me, I think that the history and pageantry more than make up for the lack of All-Americans. My problem with this matchup is what happens after the game ends. At the conclusion of the game, both teams go out into the middle of the field and sing each other’s alma maters together. Are you kidding me?!?! I never knew trained assassins could be such pussies. Way too much respect for your opponent to be the best rivalry, in my infallible opinion.
1. Michigan-Ohio State
Why It’s the Best Rivalry: Two of the most storied programs in the nation are involved in this annual bloodbath. Between them, they have won 18 National Titles and 77 Big Ten Titles. On 23 different occasions, the game has decided which of the two teams would win the Big 10 title, so it is more or less the Big 10 Title Game year after year. They have played 105 times and didn’t even pause during World War II. Sorry, Nazis, but we’ve got a game to play. They have two of the greatest coaches on either side in Bo Schembechler and Woody Hayes, whose rivalry was so intense that they called their matchup the “Ten Year War.”Fun Fact: When Woody Hayes questioned by the media why he went for 2 in the fourth quarter of the 1968 game despite having a 50-14 lead, Hayes responded, “Because I couldn’t go for three.” Wow.
Why It’s Not: From 1835 to 1836, the state of Michigan and the state of Ohio waged war over the territory surrounding Toledo, Ohio. The Game is considered to simply be a continuation of this war. So this game is actually based on a literal war. Wait, does this only further prove that it’s the best rivalry in college football? This matchup dominates the competition
Saturday, November 29, 2008
POINT: Parting ways would be a Weis decision.
Here's a relevant nursery rhyme:Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall.
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the King's horses and all the King's men
Couldn't put Humpty together again.
In the case of the storied Fighting Irish of Notre Dame, we all know who Humpty Dumpty is. We all know where in Indiana the wall is located. And we all should know recognize that the pieces can't be mended. Humpty is fucked, and he's bringing the wall down with him.
Now I am not a Notre Dame fan. In fact, I don't like them at all. But it does kill me to see the most storied program in college football crumbling before our very eyes. One thing became plainly obvious in the press conferences and body language following the heartbreaking 24-23 loss to Syracuse last week. Let's pause a minute...they lost to Syracuse. Wow.
Students were pelting their players. The team was booed. Charlie Weis has lost his fans. Now he needs to get lost.
I am of the opinion that Weis simply isn't the man for the job at Notre Dame. He has talent on that team--that is to say, there are less or equally talented teams that have better records than Notre Dame this year (see the ACC, Nebraska). And yet, Weis has lost control. He has 9 wins--NINE!--over the past two seasons at a program that historically is, to put it lightly, used to winning.
Why isn't he the man for the job? Simply, he is not inspiring, he is arrogant, and he's not automatically a great head coach, even with great experience. We can look at these three in reverse order.
- He's not automatically a great head coach, even with great experience. He was never a head coach prior to his tenure here, and there might be a reason. He had been in the NFL as an assistant/offensive coordinator for 15 years without even being seriously considered a coach, and he was game-planning for 4 Super Bowl Champion teams during his tenure. Yet if you look at the personality of those teams, they were laid back, silent-assassins--a great way to be in the NFL, but not the right mindset for college athletes. They need to stay hungry and be aggressive. The point here is that even though Weis was a proven winner as an assistant and a coordinator, he was never even a finalist for a coaching job until he went to his alma mater. And there, he became a savior, even though the only thing he is truly interested in saving is room for dessert.
- He is arrogant. Picture this (and this is reported to have actually happened). Your son is a star high school football player, and he already has offers from Mack Brown, the classiest coach in the league and Urban Meyer, the hungriest coach in the league. Now look who waddles into your living room--Charlie Weis, the head ball coach at Notre Dame. He's soft spoken, but has this air of "we are Notre Dame, you should want to come here" about him. But does he tout his University? Perhaps a little, but he truly ices the cake when he takes his hand out of his pocket. He places his hand on the table so that everyone in the room can get a good look at his Super Bowl rings. "Look at what I won," he thinks to himself. That's not the way a Notre Dame football coach should behave. Past coaches were humbled by the opportunity to coach there--Weis almost gives off the aura that it is his right, not his privilege.
- We always talk about great athletes and how they have "It." Nobody can quite say what "It" is, but you know when your player has it. I also believe that great coaches have "It" as well. They can rally the troops when they need to. They always seem to make the right decisions. Notre Dame has a history of coaches who had "It." Ara Parseghian did, Knute Rockne did...heck, even Lou Holtz did (though he seems to have lotht it now). Now Weis seems to be less like those three and more like a Gerry Faust (allegorical connections aside), the guy who came in and was supposed to return them to prominence and whose greatest accomplishment was a 7-5 season and the Alamo Bowl. Faust left the Irish to be the head coach at the University of Akron. He didn't have "It" and Weis doesn't either. He's lost games, the fans and perhaps even his players (a lot of transfers are now rumored).
I think Weis could be a great guy, but he has to go. He might even be a great coach somewhere else. But not Notre Dame. The school deserves better than him. They need someone who can really put the 'Fight' back in Fighting Irish.
COUNTERPOINT: YOU'RE AN IDIOT
Where to begin? I'll start with your personal attack on Weis. You claim that part of Weis' problem is that he's arrogant because he wears his Super Bowl rings when he recruits. If you have a problem with this, that's fine, but don't make idiotic comparisons to other coaches. You juxtapose Weis with Urban Meyer. Let's remember that Urban Meyer had rings made for his 2004 Utah team that had "The Real National Champions." Apparently, "Fuck You, Pete Carrol" didn't come in the font he wanted. So the thought that he isn't wearing that ring and his 2007 National Title ring during his recruiting visits is stupid. He does the exact same thing as Weis. The only difference is Meyer can promise recruits the chance to be the next Alex Smith. Weis can promise them the chance to be the next Tom Brady. Tough Call.
You also bring up Mack Brown, and make the claim he's the classiest guy in college coaching. Yep, pretty much, that's all I think of when I think of Mack Brown. Class. You read that score right. In the 2005 Big 12 Championship game, Mack Brown hung the classiest 70 points on a traditional opponent that college football has ever seen. Man, he really is a super guy, and isn't now trying to play the "classy" card because his team can't score more than 35 on Kansas. Great point. I would also like to point out that I think Charlie Weis carries his body quite well, thank you very much.
But Mack Brown is actually a good reason why Charlie Weis shouldn't be fired from Notre Dame this season (key point, I think he gets one more year). Mack Browns first four years at UNC had records of: 1-10, 1-10, 6-4-1, 7-5. Why did they stick with him after that? Because they were a terrible program, and it takes a while to rebuild. The reason Ty Willingham was fired in the first place was because his recruiting had tailed off. NOTE: this does not mean it was always bad, it meant that it had suddenly turned bad. So yes, Charlie Weis won early with another coaches players, but it was because the juniors and seniors on the team were talented. Fast forward to last year: all those terrible freshmen and sophomores that Weis inherited were now juniors and seniors. So, he had the option of playing his freshmen recruits (which was considered a top 5 class) or playing upper classmen that were awful. Which do you choose? And are you surprised this team goes 3-9? Let's see what Texas' record would be if they were not allowed to play any of their upper classmen. Just because freshmen are talented doesn't mean they are ready to contribute on every play. Now let's look at this year. Still, you have no upperclassmen, you just have a bunch of talented freshmen and sophomores. What would you expect this team to look like? Show some moments of great promise, some moments of complete ineptitude, but overall steady improvement? I think that's what you've gotten out of the Irish this season. Why didn't UNC fire Mack, or Texas for that matter when he was getting owned by Bob Stoops from 2000=2004? Because it takes time to overhaul a roster and he was still recruiting effectively. I think Weis is doing both at Notre Dame thus far, so he deserves another year. Granted, if he still can't win 8-9 games with his players as upperclassmen, he should be shown the door.
And then there's the issue about the whole "contract" thing. When one source with knowledge the terms of the deal describes his buyout as "stupefying" in 2008 college football terms, you have to pause for a moment of reflection. To fire Weis, it is believed that you would have to immediately write him a check for somewhere between $10 million and, wait for it, wait for it, wait for it, 32 MILLION DOLLARS. Want to put that in perspective? According to the New York Times (see article here), Notre Dame's entire athletic budget is $13.5 million this year. So, Notre Dame, would you rather have Charlie Weis coach your team next year, or would you rather pay him and not have any team, in any sport, for the next 1-3 years? It's easy to say "uuuuh, I'm drunk and angry about a loss, fire the coach." It's a lot harder to do when you see the actual money involved.
Friday, November 28, 2008
49-9 is Not the Combination to the BCS
Despite being at an agricultural and mineralogical disadvantage last night, the Longhorns still drove the Aggies into the ground. Beating any team by an Olde English is impressive (and smooth and refreshing), however how big of a statement is this win within the BCS picture? A&M was eliminated from bowl contention this year when they decided to suit up and the game's importance seemed artificially inflated because it is a rivalry game. A Three-Way divisional tie appears imminent unless Gundy's squad can man-up and beat Oklahoma. I think Tech is going to destroy Baylor, a team who thought its season was over two weeks ago. So where does this leave us? Did Texas just play its last game in 2008? Is Baylor going to be Adam James' breakout game? I also have a distinct feeling that Tebow will go ghostface from about 45 yards while Bowden is interviewed by Lisa Salters and celebrate in the endzone by simultaneously resuscitating an orphan child and his Heisman hopes.
Whatever the outcome of this week may be, unless a Criminole shanks Tebow on Saturday or Missouri makes some noise in the conference championship game, we are looking at a SEC-Big 12 BCS championship game, which means that the pollsters do not have big love for Utah.
Whatever the outcome of this week may be, unless a Criminole shanks Tebow on Saturday or Missouri makes some noise in the conference championship game, we are looking at a SEC-Big 12 BCS championship game, which means that the pollsters do not have big love for Utah.
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Lions....suuuper!!
What is the point of showing the Detroit Lions lose every Thanksgiving? I think I lead a pretty basic life and would say that I generally enjoy things to be expected. So, I guess it could be perceived as good that on Thanksgiving I can rely on having a swollen belly and can take comfort in the fact that the Lions will lose. But is it necessary every year? I enjoy traditions and can appreciate them, but it's getting rediculous.
As a Titans fan, I was very happy to see the return of some dominant ground attacks supported by an adequate showing by Kerry Collins. Even Vince got to play a little! I guess my steel exterior is crumbling a little bit in pity for the unfortunate residents of the Detroit metro area. Was anyone in the stands after the 3rd quarter? I've seen more people at a Chattanooga Lookouts game.
I'm used to the Cowboys always playing on Thanksgiving, but that's mostly due to the fact that Fox is in the enternal reacharound with "America's Team" and show them, suck or no, every Sunday from August to December, including bye week. Oh well, at least they're somewhat more entertaining to watch. Nice TD pass to TO, then the cut to show Pacman Jones giving him his best rape advice on the sideline and explaining proper entorage interviewing techniques.
I'm not suggesting any solutions. At least the NFL network is showing a decent game and my viewing area happens to carry at as part of it's mid-upgrade package (either that or the cable guy thought my ass looked good in a pair of German national soccer team shorts). Surely their must be something that can be done and I'd be happy to hear what the Futbol Americano viewing world has to say about the subject.
I wish everyone the happiest of Thanksgivings.
Go Titans, Roll Tide, Generals Rule.
As a Titans fan, I was very happy to see the return of some dominant ground attacks supported by an adequate showing by Kerry Collins. Even Vince got to play a little! I guess my steel exterior is crumbling a little bit in pity for the unfortunate residents of the Detroit metro area. Was anyone in the stands after the 3rd quarter? I've seen more people at a Chattanooga Lookouts game.
I'm used to the Cowboys always playing on Thanksgiving, but that's mostly due to the fact that Fox is in the enternal reacharound with "America's Team" and show them, suck or no, every Sunday from August to December, including bye week. Oh well, at least they're somewhat more entertaining to watch. Nice TD pass to TO, then the cut to show Pacman Jones giving him his best rape advice on the sideline and explaining proper entorage interviewing techniques.
I'm not suggesting any solutions. At least the NFL network is showing a decent game and my viewing area happens to carry at as part of it's mid-upgrade package (either that or the cable guy thought my ass looked good in a pair of German national soccer team shorts). Surely their must be something that can be done and I'd be happy to hear what the Futbol Americano viewing world has to say about the subject.
I wish everyone the happiest of Thanksgivings.
Go Titans, Roll Tide, Generals Rule.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
What I Learned This Week, Part II
Here are my closing thoughts to the weekend, and what I'm looking forward to next week.
1) Bob Stoops is a great coach. I can't believe I even have to write this, but since people like Pat "Updates on Bobby Petrino Leaving Every" Forde "Minutes" have been bashing him for the past three years, it needs to be said. Bob Stoops is one of the five best coaches in all of college football and he proved it again last night. Much has been made against he recent results against Texas and in bowl games, but both of those can be misleading. Guess what, Heidi Klum has had a kid and is in her mid thirties, but I'd still sacrifice a limb for a night of intense passion with her. First of all, Mack Brown has shown the last four years that he is a much better coach than people gave him credit for his first five years in Austin, myself included. He is a great recruiter and a great coach, so Stoops losing recently against him is not a travesty. It is also not a travesty considering he happened to go against Brown when he had arguably the greatest QB in college football history (Vince Young), and also arguably one of the best QBs in Texas history not named Vince in Colt McCoy. In the last two Fiesta Bowl appearances, he had to run into a team that could play the ultimate underdog card in Boise State and another team that could play the "Your Coach Ditched You" card in West Virginia. These are not normal circumstances. He is an amazing coach and he proved it by eviscerating the team that was hands down the #2 ranked team in the country last week.
2) Sam Bradford is the best pro prospect at quarterback available in the draft next year. While I will not question that Matthew Stafford has a better arm than Bradford, I have to say Bradford has never ceased to amaze me every time I watch him play. What is most striking is that when he's in the pocket, even in what is this year clearly the best conference in college football, he genuinely looks bored looking downfield. He is not daunted to throw it downfield, he has no problem quickly checking down to a RB if his WR are covered, and he gets his tight ends involved in the offense early and often. He is mobile, much more mobile than Stafford, but still always seems to make the right decisions on the field. He is not running a traditional spread offense, so he has to actually read defenses after the snap and make decisions, and yet he still has the absurd TD-INT ratio of 42:6. Stafford tends to force throws as Todd McShay has pointed out ad nauseum, which was put on display perfectly during the Florida game. If he can be read that easily by Florida for INTs, how on earth will he last against Ed Reed and the Baltimore Ravens? Bradford also completes 68% of his passes even with a large number of downfield passes each game, so he's incredibly accurate. While I don't know how strong his arm is, especially on the always critical 15 yard out from the far hash, but mentally he is the best option for an NFL team next year.
3) Michigan is not one year away from turning it around. Much has been made about how Michigan's offensive woes are, at root, a quarterback issue. Also, people point out that in his second year, RichRod has gone 9-4 at WVU, 12-0 and Tulane, and 9-3 at Clemson after losing first seasons. While this is certainly true, bringing in two 4 star recuits in Tate Forcier and Shavodrick Beaver are not going to immediately change things in Ann Arbor. Michigan will have to play with a first year, true freshmen QB again next year which is never a good sign for instant success, and they might open with a QB who possibly did not get any reps in spring practice as well (since Forcier is not listed as starting in January). On top of that, Michigan will most likely loose 3 out of 4 staring members of their D Line, which was about the only unit that didn't embarrass itself this year, as well as it's #2 cornerback. This means the defense is getting younger and more experienced at the same time the offense will basically be starting from scratch with a new signal caller in the huddle. The hopes of next year leading to a Capital One Bowl game run just seem unrealistic. Hoping for 7-5 seems much more likely.
4) Florida State has a chance next week, although it's unlikely. FSU showed again this week against Maryland that they can play defense. They forced 4 turnovers and held a ranked team to only 3 points while playing in College Park. This is a good sign for the hope that these two teams could play a decent game next week. FSU knows Florida extremely well, and as Miami showed earlier this season, teams that know Florida can slow down the Gators offense. I fully realize that Miami slowed down a Florida team without a healthy Percy Harvin for only three quarters, and that Florida State has been terribly inconsistent the past month, and that FSU has not shown that it has an offense that scores on the Gators. What I do know is that FSU at least has the talent to give the Gators problems which means the game is actually worth watching on Saturday.
1) Bob Stoops is a great coach. I can't believe I even have to write this, but since people like Pat "Updates on Bobby Petrino Leaving Every" Forde "Minutes" have been bashing him for the past three years, it needs to be said. Bob Stoops is one of the five best coaches in all of college football and he proved it again last night. Much has been made against he recent results against Texas and in bowl games, but both of those can be misleading. Guess what, Heidi Klum has had a kid and is in her mid thirties, but I'd still sacrifice a limb for a night of intense passion with her. First of all, Mack Brown has shown the last four years that he is a much better coach than people gave him credit for his first five years in Austin, myself included. He is a great recruiter and a great coach, so Stoops losing recently against him is not a travesty. It is also not a travesty considering he happened to go against Brown when he had arguably the greatest QB in college football history (Vince Young), and also arguably one of the best QBs in Texas history not named Vince in Colt McCoy. In the last two Fiesta Bowl appearances, he had to run into a team that could play the ultimate underdog card in Boise State and another team that could play the "Your Coach Ditched You" card in West Virginia. These are not normal circumstances. He is an amazing coach and he proved it by eviscerating the team that was hands down the #2 ranked team in the country last week.
2) Sam Bradford is the best pro prospect at quarterback available in the draft next year. While I will not question that Matthew Stafford has a better arm than Bradford, I have to say Bradford has never ceased to amaze me every time I watch him play. What is most striking is that when he's in the pocket, even in what is this year clearly the best conference in college football, he genuinely looks bored looking downfield. He is not daunted to throw it downfield, he has no problem quickly checking down to a RB if his WR are covered, and he gets his tight ends involved in the offense early and often. He is mobile, much more mobile than Stafford, but still always seems to make the right decisions on the field. He is not running a traditional spread offense, so he has to actually read defenses after the snap and make decisions, and yet he still has the absurd TD-INT ratio of 42:6. Stafford tends to force throws as Todd McShay has pointed out ad nauseum, which was put on display perfectly during the Florida game. If he can be read that easily by Florida for INTs, how on earth will he last against Ed Reed and the Baltimore Ravens? Bradford also completes 68% of his passes even with a large number of downfield passes each game, so he's incredibly accurate. While I don't know how strong his arm is, especially on the always critical 15 yard out from the far hash, but mentally he is the best option for an NFL team next year.
3) Michigan is not one year away from turning it around. Much has been made about how Michigan's offensive woes are, at root, a quarterback issue. Also, people point out that in his second year, RichRod has gone 9-4 at WVU, 12-0 and Tulane, and 9-3 at Clemson after losing first seasons. While this is certainly true, bringing in two 4 star recuits in Tate Forcier and Shavodrick Beaver are not going to immediately change things in Ann Arbor. Michigan will have to play with a first year, true freshmen QB again next year which is never a good sign for instant success, and they might open with a QB who possibly did not get any reps in spring practice as well (since Forcier is not listed as starting in January). On top of that, Michigan will most likely loose 3 out of 4 staring members of their D Line, which was about the only unit that didn't embarrass itself this year, as well as it's #2 cornerback. This means the defense is getting younger and more experienced at the same time the offense will basically be starting from scratch with a new signal caller in the huddle. The hopes of next year leading to a Capital One Bowl game run just seem unrealistic. Hoping for 7-5 seems much more likely.
4) Florida State has a chance next week, although it's unlikely. FSU showed again this week against Maryland that they can play defense. They forced 4 turnovers and held a ranked team to only 3 points while playing in College Park. This is a good sign for the hope that these two teams could play a decent game next week. FSU knows Florida extremely well, and as Miami showed earlier this season, teams that know Florida can slow down the Gators offense. I fully realize that Miami slowed down a Florida team without a healthy Percy Harvin for only three quarters, and that Florida State has been terribly inconsistent the past month, and that FSU has not shown that it has an offense that scores on the Gators. What I do know is that FSU at least has the talent to give the Gators problems which means the game is actually worth watching on Saturday.
Bama
Some thoughts I woke up with that Florida and, God Willing, whoever Bama plays in the national championship game will have to consider. If you look at Bama's record this season, they actually played their best games away from Bryant-Denny. Clemson, Georgia, and (arguably a well-played game, inarguably entertaining) LSU. Another factor for Florida to consider, Bama played what was probably its best game of the season against Clemson in the Georgia Dome. Possibly an edge going in to the SEC title game.
I'm rooting for Texas / Tide in the national title game. Between that and a potential Giants / Titans Super Bowl, Brad and I would have plenty to talk about.
I'm rooting for Texas / Tide in the national title game. Between that and a potential Giants / Titans Super Bowl, Brad and I would have plenty to talk about.
Saturday, November 22, 2008
spin
I agree with you Brooks. However, your whole thesis is complicated further by the fact that Ole Miss actually beat Florida in the Swamp.
What We learned for next week, National Title Wise
Norman police have repeated numerous calls about a rape that took place on Saturday evening. According to reports, it was gruesome and lasted roughly 3.5 hours.
The biggest thing we learned has to deal with the national title game picture. It is now virtually guaranteed that there will be at least one loss team in the title game for the third straight year, so the argument shifts to who is number two. The front runners are Oklahoma, Florida, USC and Texas. What I've learned from this weekend is nothing. As of now, none of these teams have done anything to show they deserve to play for it all.
There's an expression in the NBA playoffs that it's not a series until one teams wins on the road. That holds true this year in the college football. Alabama has beaten Georgia and LSU on the road, so they have proven that they can win away from home. Texas beat Oklahoma at a neutral site, beat Missouri and Oklahoma State at home, and then lost to Texas Tech on the road. Their best road win: beating 6-5 Kansas. Florida beat Georgia at a neutral site, Miami, LSU and and South Carolina, and lost to Ole Miss in the impenetrable Swamp. Their best road win of the year: defeating 6-5 Vanderbilt in always hostile Nashville. Oklahoma has beaten Texas Tech at home, but lost to Texas at neutral site. Their best win on the road: over 5-7 Kansas State. USC beat Ohio State at home, but lost to Oregon State on the road. Their best road win: over 6-5 Arizona.
So, these teams have beaten nobody on the road. It's great that you control your home field, which they have all done, but you are not a great team until you win a big game on the road. Neutral sites also do not count. When you split the stadium 50-50 between the fans, it's no longer a road game. A great team must show that it can walk into the most hostile of environments, stare directly into the belly of the beast, and walk away a winner. Champions win on the road.
So what to watch next week? Two teams actually have a chance to win big road games. Sorry Texas and USC, you are both not on this list. Texas has A&M at home, while USC has a de facto game whenever they play at the Rose Bowl since it's just on the other side of the city.
What we do have, however, is Florida who travels to Tallahassee to play the Seminoles. While Florida State is by no means a good team, in fact they are incredibly inconsistent and average team in an average conference, it will at least be a win against a team who sells out there games. Realistically, this is not an impressive road win because you are not beating an impressive team. I'm sure Urban Meyer will put up huge points and voters will cream themselves, but it's not a good road win.
Oklahoma, on the other hand, does have the chance to score an impressive road win. They travel to Stillwater to play Oklahoma State, a team that's #11 in the country and 9-2. They will sell out, and you have a cross-state hatred that will motivate the fans and Ok State to really crush Oklahoma. If OU can win in that environment, then they will be the first team other than Alabama to show me something. If they win that game, then we'll have our clear #2 team in the country.
The biggest thing we learned has to deal with the national title game picture. It is now virtually guaranteed that there will be at least one loss team in the title game for the third straight year, so the argument shifts to who is number two. The front runners are Oklahoma, Florida, USC and Texas. What I've learned from this weekend is nothing. As of now, none of these teams have done anything to show they deserve to play for it all.
There's an expression in the NBA playoffs that it's not a series until one teams wins on the road. That holds true this year in the college football. Alabama has beaten Georgia and LSU on the road, so they have proven that they can win away from home. Texas beat Oklahoma at a neutral site, beat Missouri and Oklahoma State at home, and then lost to Texas Tech on the road. Their best road win: beating 6-5 Kansas. Florida beat Georgia at a neutral site, Miami, LSU and and South Carolina, and lost to Ole Miss in the impenetrable Swamp. Their best road win of the year: defeating 6-5 Vanderbilt in always hostile Nashville. Oklahoma has beaten Texas Tech at home, but lost to Texas at neutral site. Their best win on the road: over 5-7 Kansas State. USC beat Ohio State at home, but lost to Oregon State on the road. Their best road win: over 6-5 Arizona.
So, these teams have beaten nobody on the road. It's great that you control your home field, which they have all done, but you are not a great team until you win a big game on the road. Neutral sites also do not count. When you split the stadium 50-50 between the fans, it's no longer a road game. A great team must show that it can walk into the most hostile of environments, stare directly into the belly of the beast, and walk away a winner. Champions win on the road.
So what to watch next week? Two teams actually have a chance to win big road games. Sorry Texas and USC, you are both not on this list. Texas has A&M at home, while USC has a de facto game whenever they play at the Rose Bowl since it's just on the other side of the city.
What we do have, however, is Florida who travels to Tallahassee to play the Seminoles. While Florida State is by no means a good team, in fact they are incredibly inconsistent and average team in an average conference, it will at least be a win against a team who sells out there games. Realistically, this is not an impressive road win because you are not beating an impressive team. I'm sure Urban Meyer will put up huge points and voters will cream themselves, but it's not a good road win.
Oklahoma, on the other hand, does have the chance to score an impressive road win. They travel to Stillwater to play Oklahoma State, a team that's #11 in the country and 9-2. They will sell out, and you have a cross-state hatred that will motivate the fans and Ok State to really crush Oklahoma. If OU can win in that environment, then they will be the first team other than Alabama to show me something. If they win that game, then we'll have our clear #2 team in the country.
Herbstreet already is giving it to Florida. Now that Harrell's thrown his first pick of the year, all the media's going to be jumping over everything to get Tebow another Heisman. Although, now that Ole Miss put the hurt on LSU (are they down to their 5th string QB now?), that 4th and 1 is looking worse and worse for him and is making their win over LSU a touch more unimpressive.
Texas Tech-OU Blog
The first live blog this morning was such a success, we're doing it again tonight for what is apparently the biggest match up since FDR went toe-to-toe with Hitler in 1941.
My question: how did they find 82,000 people in Oklahoma who didn't already have crazy Saturday night plans and could make this late kickoff?
14:07 Left in the 1st
Uncle D: ABC just posted Harrell's gaudy stats. The knock on the Texas Tech quarterback is that his numbers are a result of being a system quarterback . . . specifically XBOX. Those numbers don't make sense without an analog.
13:51 Left in the 1st
Brooks: Well, we officially have our drinking game tonight. Did you know that Mike Leach once coached at OU under Stoops? Neither did I, so take a shot. You'll be drunk with this game-- Sooner or Raider! Awful
12:54 Left in the 1st
Brooks: Mike Leach shows just how committed he is to his spread passing game that their punter actually shot puts the ball downfield rather than kicking it
11:40 Left in the 1st
Uncle D: Just too appease those who will be double fisting tonight, I was hoping that Mike Leach would be coaching in a long white lab coat. Perhaps some smoking beakers will be in play later on, we will see . . .
Who Do I Root For?
Hoogs: This is a tough one. If Tech wins, my Longhorns are virtually guaranteed a BCS bid to the Fiesta Bowl. If OU wins, it opens up the often talked-about scenario that might allow Texas a shot at the title.
My question: how did they find 82,000 people in Oklahoma who didn't already have crazy Saturday night plans and could make this late kickoff?
14:07 Left in the 1st
Uncle D: ABC just posted Harrell's gaudy stats. The knock on the Texas Tech quarterback is that his numbers are a result of being a system quarterback . . . specifically XBOX. Those numbers don't make sense without an analog.
13:51 Left in the 1st
Brooks: Well, we officially have our drinking game tonight. Did you know that Mike Leach once coached at OU under Stoops? Neither did I, so take a shot. You'll be drunk with this game-- Sooner or Raider! Awful
12:54 Left in the 1st
Brooks: Mike Leach shows just how committed he is to his spread passing game that their punter actually shot puts the ball downfield rather than kicking it
11:40 Left in the 1st
Uncle D: Just too appease those who will be double fisting tonight, I was hoping that Mike Leach would be coaching in a long white lab coat. Perhaps some smoking beakers will be in play later on, we will see . . .
Who Do I Root For?
Hoogs: This is a tough one. If Tech wins, my Longhorns are virtually guaranteed a BCS bid to the Fiesta Bowl. If OU wins, it opens up the often talked-about scenario that might allow Texas a shot at the title.
Right now it looks like OU has the Tech defense's number. How can this be????? It's the NEW TTU defense!!! Wrong. The 'new' TTU defense has thrived not on talent, but on emotion. In the end, talent wins out (except in the Horns' case).
It's obvious I like each team about as much as Clay Aiken likes women. Back to the original question--who do I root for?
I believe Screech Powers puts it best in a classic episode from "The College Years":
THE REFS.
10:03 Left in the 1st
Uncle D: I agree Brooks, they are playing the Leach-Stoops connection as if they were Obama-Ayers. I just took a self-induced drink incidentally.
9:03 Left in the 1st
Brooks: Does anyone else get the feeling that when he worked in Norman, Leach was the Turtle of the coaching staff?
And if that's the case, is this basically the football equivalent of Turtle getting an interview to start in the new Batman movie as the Penguin?
8:59 Left in the 1st
Uncle D: OU just pounded it in from the goal line. 7-0. Brent Mustberger just promised me a shoot-out-- I hope the mad scientist takes a Paxil and plays conservative out of spite . . .
Brooks: And the teacher strikes first against the student. Can't say I disagree with his game plan: hand the ball off to Adrian Peterson all day. What, that's not Adrian Peterson? I think it is, and he is celebrating having 4 new years of eligibility by taking a number one-fourth the size of his own
7:45 Left in the First
Uncle D: Matt Weiner in the ABC studio just referred to Utah-BYU as the "Holy War," which just reeks of insensitivity . . . I think the Big Love Bowl is more appropriate and relevant in the Paxton household.
Brooks: we just got our in game update on the BYU-Utah game. I still don't know why people are so intrigued by this game. The ending is in the Book of Revelations. It says the world will end if a team that could only beat Michigan by 3 points makes it to a BCS Bowl Game
12:51 Left in the Half
Brooks: Craig James' Son Update: 0 catches. But like his Dad, he's made 3 really dick comments about OU on the sidelines
12:07 Left in the Half
Hoogs: Are there more than 8 bars to the Sooner Fight Song? What an awful melody!
10:03 Left in the 1st
Uncle D: I agree Brooks, they are playing the Leach-Stoops connection as if they were Obama-Ayers. I just took a self-induced drink incidentally.
9:03 Left in the 1st
Brooks: Does anyone else get the feeling that when he worked in Norman, Leach was the Turtle of the coaching staff?
And if that's the case, is this basically the football equivalent of Turtle getting an interview to start in the new Batman movie as the Penguin?
8:59 Left in the 1st
Uncle D: OU just pounded it in from the goal line. 7-0. Brent Mustberger just promised me a shoot-out-- I hope the mad scientist takes a Paxil and plays conservative out of spite . . .
Brooks: And the teacher strikes first against the student. Can't say I disagree with his game plan: hand the ball off to Adrian Peterson all day. What, that's not Adrian Peterson? I think it is, and he is celebrating having 4 new years of eligibility by taking a number one-fourth the size of his own
7:45 Left in the First
Uncle D: Matt Weiner in the ABC studio just referred to Utah-BYU as the "Holy War," which just reeks of insensitivity . . . I think the Big Love Bowl is more appropriate and relevant in the Paxton household.
Brooks: we just got our in game update on the BYU-Utah game. I still don't know why people are so intrigued by this game. The ending is in the Book of Revelations. It says the world will end if a team that could only beat Michigan by 3 points makes it to a BCS Bowl Game
12:51 Left in the Half
Brooks: Craig James' Son Update: 0 catches. But like his Dad, he's made 3 really dick comments about OU on the sidelines
12:07 Left in the Half
Hoogs: Are there more than 8 bars to the Sooner Fight Song? What an awful melody!
The Tech offense is looking atrocious. Musberger and Herbstreit are right--it looks like the defense knows what is coming.
One thing that they haven't commented on is how much bigger the Sooners look both on offense and defense. I really do wonder if Tech can make up this difference. The offense looks demoralized and if they don't get Crabtree involved soon with a big play, then this game might already be over. I know they can score quickly, but they have no momentum at all.
Usually, Tech goes for a couple of long throws early--there has been nothing tonight.
And someone needs to tackle DeMarco Murray. He is making the Red Raiders look like Michigan out there!
10:58 Left in the Half
Brooks: This game is already out of hand. OU's defense is getting pressure on Klingsbury, and more importantly, they are tackling really well so TTU can't get any YAC even when they complete a pass. If I'm an OU fan, I'm thrilled at how good they look but a little pissed it took 10 games to get it together.
The OU offense also looks on unstoppable. Bradford actually looks bored out there because there's no rush and all the passes are so easy for him.
So, do we start the Murray- Heisman 09 campaign now, or do we have to wait for Mike Lupica to say it with the most smug tone of voice possible on the SportsReporters?
Don't Have Much Else To Say
Hoogs: It is awesome that Notre Dame lost to Syracuse. Wow.
10:26 Left in the Half
Brooks: I just realized that the Citadel could score 19 points against Florida, but Michigan only scored 7 on Ohio State.
I have started drinking
8:20 Left in the Half
Brooks: Bradford just showed how NFL ready he is by deftly sliding to avoid contact with a safety. Headsy play.
Also, Herbstreit just said that Bradford is a great athlete because he played golf in high school. Really? Golf?
8:02 Left in the Half
Uncle D: The Mad Scientist is seriously coaching this game like a pissed off Madden player. 4th and what from my own what . . . doesn't matter, keep in the offense and choose an illogical pass play. The result 21-0. The only difference is Leach doesn't have a reset button . . . that I know of
14:53 In the 3rd
Brooks: Mad Scientist on the loose, and it looked like he cooked up something crazy in the locker room! Onside kick to open the half by Texas Tech. It didn't work, but I love the call. Put some balls in this game
This Is Laughable
Hoogs: What I want to know is this: does this game make Texas look better or worse? Yes, they lost to Tech, but on the last second and on the road--everyone knows that strange things happen in Lubbbock.
10:58 Left in the Half
Brooks: This game is already out of hand. OU's defense is getting pressure on Klingsbury, and more importantly, they are tackling really well so TTU can't get any YAC even when they complete a pass. If I'm an OU fan, I'm thrilled at how good they look but a little pissed it took 10 games to get it together.
The OU offense also looks on unstoppable. Bradford actually looks bored out there because there's no rush and all the passes are so easy for him.
So, do we start the Murray- Heisman 09 campaign now, or do we have to wait for Mike Lupica to say it with the most smug tone of voice possible on the SportsReporters?
Don't Have Much Else To Say
Hoogs: It is awesome that Notre Dame lost to Syracuse. Wow.
10:26 Left in the Half
Brooks: I just realized that the Citadel could score 19 points against Florida, but Michigan only scored 7 on Ohio State.
I have started drinking
8:20 Left in the Half
Brooks: Bradford just showed how NFL ready he is by deftly sliding to avoid contact with a safety. Headsy play.
Also, Herbstreit just said that Bradford is a great athlete because he played golf in high school. Really? Golf?
8:02 Left in the Half
Uncle D: The Mad Scientist is seriously coaching this game like a pissed off Madden player. 4th and what from my own what . . . doesn't matter, keep in the offense and choose an illogical pass play. The result 21-0. The only difference is Leach doesn't have a reset button . . . that I know of
14:53 In the 3rd
Brooks: Mad Scientist on the loose, and it looked like he cooked up something crazy in the locker room! Onside kick to open the half by Texas Tech. It didn't work, but I love the call. Put some balls in this game
This Is Laughable
Hoogs: What I want to know is this: does this game make Texas look better or worse? Yes, they lost to Tech, but on the last second and on the road--everyone knows that strange things happen in Lubbbock.
But at the same time, Texas beat OU on a neutral field.
So how do you vote? I have no idea, so good luck to voters.
11:06 In the 3rd
Brooks: If Mike Leach was truly an outside the box thinker, he'd bust out some 7 v 7 offense now, just to send a message to his former boss
9:40 Left in the 3rd
Hoogs: Texas Tech just fumbled their season away.
I Loathe These Teams
Hoogs: I am seething. TTU is so overrated and it makes me so angry that they beat Texas. They don't deserve to be in this conversation of great teams in college football. I hope all of these Red Raider fans who have been on their high horse for 3 weeks finally keep their mouths shut. Serves them right.
11:06 In the 3rd
Brooks: If Mike Leach was truly an outside the box thinker, he'd bust out some 7 v 7 offense now, just to send a message to his former boss
9:40 Left in the 3rd
Hoogs: Texas Tech just fumbled their season away.
I Loathe These Teams
Hoogs: I am seething. TTU is so overrated and it makes me so angry that they beat Texas. They don't deserve to be in this conversation of great teams in college football. I hope all of these Red Raider fans who have been on their high horse for 3 weeks finally keep their mouths shut. Serves them right.
OU is just terrible, and I hate them. And Texas beat them.
That was me venting. And I apologize.
Uncle D: It is ok to vent . . . Coors Light douchers do it on TV all the time
I went out and bought beer for 5 people. Thanks to Mike Leach and this pathetic effort, my company has mutually decided to go home and I am left with a fridge full of pretentious beer cocktails that I would never drink. This is more egregious than the Packers-Chargers reversal from last week . . .
8:56 Left in the 3rd
Brooks: What's sad is that even though Texas Tech has completely shat the bed tonight, if you're a Tennessee fan you still have to want Mike Leach because there's no way you'd keep an OU team this fired up under 100 points.
I think
Hoogs: That horse-collar tackles should immediately get players ejected from the game. That tackle on Crabtree was absurd. It was unnecessary and judging by the OU DB's demeanor after the tackle, it was at least partially malicious. And now Crabtree, perhaps the only bright spot for Tech and (I will maintain my stance) the best player on the field, has taken himself out of the game.
4:20 Left in the 3rd
Brooks: I had a post, but then they showed Herbstreit on TV. Suddenly, all my apprehensions and anger disappeared amongst of flood of warmth and happiness. I could get lost in those eyes forever, like two blue disks of heaven waiting to take me to eternal bliss
A New Voice
Log: Obviously OU got the memo that the punt block formation always works against Texas Tech.
He's Going For It?
Hoogs: Stoops is a dick.
Brooks: Gotta disagree with you, I think it was actually a non-dick move. He's got the ball inside the 5 yard line, so it's not like he had the option to punt the ball. What he wants to do is keep the clock moving and shorten the game. Running the ball between the tackles, which he did, was incredibly predictable. He knew Texas Tech would probably stop it and get the ball back, and honestly if they let OU score there, then they deserve to be embarrassed
Uncle D: It is ok to vent . . . Coors Light douchers do it on TV all the time
I went out and bought beer for 5 people. Thanks to Mike Leach and this pathetic effort, my company has mutually decided to go home and I am left with a fridge full of pretentious beer cocktails that I would never drink. This is more egregious than the Packers-Chargers reversal from last week . . .
8:56 Left in the 3rd
Brooks: What's sad is that even though Texas Tech has completely shat the bed tonight, if you're a Tennessee fan you still have to want Mike Leach because there's no way you'd keep an OU team this fired up under 100 points.
I think
Hoogs: That horse-collar tackles should immediately get players ejected from the game. That tackle on Crabtree was absurd. It was unnecessary and judging by the OU DB's demeanor after the tackle, it was at least partially malicious. And now Crabtree, perhaps the only bright spot for Tech and (I will maintain my stance) the best player on the field, has taken himself out of the game.
Brooks: I had a post, but then they showed Herbstreit on TV. Suddenly, all my apprehensions and anger disappeared amongst of flood of warmth and happiness. I could get lost in those eyes forever, like two blue disks of heaven waiting to take me to eternal bliss
A New Voice
Log: Obviously OU got the memo that the punt block formation always works against Texas Tech.
He's Going For It?
Hoogs: Stoops is a dick.
But a smart dick.
Mack Brown needs to take notes. Because the only chance Texas has at a national title game is to put up 70 on A&M this coming Thursday on national TV. They are the only game on, and the nation will be watching.
Brooks: Gotta disagree with you, I think it was actually a non-dick move. He's got the ball inside the 5 yard line, so it's not like he had the option to punt the ball. What he wants to do is keep the clock moving and shorten the game. Running the ball between the tackles, which he did, was incredibly predictable. He knew Texas Tech would probably stop it and get the ball back, and honestly if they let OU score there, then they deserve to be embarrassed
Michigan-Ohio State Live Blog
Welcome everyone, to our first live blog. Uncle D and I are going to break down and give our reactions to the best rivalry in major college football: Ohio State Michigan.
I am currently wearing my Michigan shirt, have some pizza and chips ready, and have not begun drinking. I'm watching the game with my friend and fellow Michigan fan Clark, and we have spent the last forty minutes trying to talk ourselves into believing in this upset. I'm on board, he is not.
Enjoy.
15:00 Left in the First
Brooks: So Paul McGuire just said he didn't realize this game was a rivalry. I hate him as much as I hate taffy. And I'm a man who hates his taffy
11:09 Left in the First
Brooks: You have got to be kidding me. Great play by the defense to get the INT, and then the offense decides that the word "suck" up to this point does not have a proper meaning so they are going to redefine the term. First and 10 from the 12 yard line, and 0 points?! WHAT?!?! This is unreal, defense made a play and the offense was beyond words bad.
I also enjoy McGuire pointing out that the offense waited too long to call a play on 3rd and 10. Really. Have you never seen a game with the spread before? They always go no huddle and wait until the last ten seconds to snap the ball so they can adjust based on what the defense shows them. How is it that I know this, and he doesn't when it's his job?
8:14 Left in the First
Brooks: You have got to be kidding me. Great play by the defense to get the INT, and then the offense decides that the word "suck" up to this point does not have a proper meaning so they are going to redefine the term. First and 10 from the 12 yard line, and 0 points?! WHAT?!?! This is unreal, defense made a play and the offense was beyond words bad.
I also enjoy McGuire pointing out that the offense waited too long to call a play on 3rd and 10. Really. Have you never seen a game with the spread before? They always go no huddle and wait until the last ten seconds to snap the ball so they can adjust based on what the defense shows them. How is it that I know this, and he doesn't when it's his job?
3:57 Left in the First
Brooks: Wait, what year is it? I thought Beanie Wells ran for a sixty yard touchdown when somehow Michigan had no second level of defense last year. Well, it happened again. Tressel had started to panic and had gone crazy conservative after failing on the first three drives-- which was amazing on their part-- and then blew it.
Hope you like running the ball, fans, because Ohio State is going to start playing the clock game now.
First Quarter Thoughts
Brooks: Thankfully, this game is 25% over. It was just painful to watch.
Defensively, Michigan is doing a great job. They have shut off Pryor on the run, have hit him three times, and have picked him off. The big run to Wells was obviously awful, but with 3 minutes left in the quarter OSU was only averaging .6 yards per play. Hard to argue with that.
The offense, on the other hand, is beyond words. Michigan can't do anything down field, are committing penalties, and in general are doing their best to make me want to scoop my eyes out with a spoon. If that wasn't enough, the Ohio State defense is playing awesome. The secondary is in blanket coverage on all their receivers and tackling well on Michigan's screens. Laurenitis is also all over the field, if only someone in the media could come up with some clever zoological name to describe how plays the game. Oh well.
13:10 Left in the Half
Brooks: Game over.
The thought of Michigan scoring more than 9 points is so inconceivable it will actually make your head explode if you try to even imagine it. Since Ohio State has now scored 14 points, they've won. Michigan's only hope now is to keep it within fifty.
12:07 Left in the Half
Uncle D: Well ABC just came back from the break showing a shot of the Ohio State drum line. Perhaps, this is where Michigan can contribute to the rivalry this afternoon at Halftime as they have a brash new drummer who plays by his own rhythm and own rules. Rumors are circulating however that he can't read music . . .
9:19 Left in the Half
Uncle D: Despite having it in front of them the entire half, Paul Maguire seems surprised when his colleague reveals the answer to the Aflac Trivia question. Also, if Michigan was the first school to seemingly ironically perform "Ohio," then why would Ohio State embrace it. That would be like Dave Coulier ditching his Popeye impression and singing a cover of "You Oughta Know"
I am currently wearing my Michigan shirt, have some pizza and chips ready, and have not begun drinking. I'm watching the game with my friend and fellow Michigan fan Clark, and we have spent the last forty minutes trying to talk ourselves into believing in this upset. I'm on board, he is not.
Enjoy.
15:00 Left in the First
Brooks: So Paul McGuire just said he didn't realize this game was a rivalry. I hate him as much as I hate taffy. And I'm a man who hates his taffy
11:09 Left in the First
Brooks: You have got to be kidding me. Great play by the defense to get the INT, and then the offense decides that the word "suck" up to this point does not have a proper meaning so they are going to redefine the term. First and 10 from the 12 yard line, and 0 points?! WHAT?!?! This is unreal, defense made a play and the offense was beyond words bad.
I also enjoy McGuire pointing out that the offense waited too long to call a play on 3rd and 10. Really. Have you never seen a game with the spread before? They always go no huddle and wait until the last ten seconds to snap the ball so they can adjust based on what the defense shows them. How is it that I know this, and he doesn't when it's his job?
8:14 Left in the First
Brooks: You have got to be kidding me. Great play by the defense to get the INT, and then the offense decides that the word "suck" up to this point does not have a proper meaning so they are going to redefine the term. First and 10 from the 12 yard line, and 0 points?! WHAT?!?! This is unreal, defense made a play and the offense was beyond words bad.
I also enjoy McGuire pointing out that the offense waited too long to call a play on 3rd and 10. Really. Have you never seen a game with the spread before? They always go no huddle and wait until the last ten seconds to snap the ball so they can adjust based on what the defense shows them. How is it that I know this, and he doesn't when it's his job?
3:57 Left in the First
Brooks: Wait, what year is it? I thought Beanie Wells ran for a sixty yard touchdown when somehow Michigan had no second level of defense last year. Well, it happened again. Tressel had started to panic and had gone crazy conservative after failing on the first three drives-- which was amazing on their part-- and then blew it.
Hope you like running the ball, fans, because Ohio State is going to start playing the clock game now.
First Quarter Thoughts
Brooks: Thankfully, this game is 25% over. It was just painful to watch.
Defensively, Michigan is doing a great job. They have shut off Pryor on the run, have hit him three times, and have picked him off. The big run to Wells was obviously awful, but with 3 minutes left in the quarter OSU was only averaging .6 yards per play. Hard to argue with that.
The offense, on the other hand, is beyond words. Michigan can't do anything down field, are committing penalties, and in general are doing their best to make me want to scoop my eyes out with a spoon. If that wasn't enough, the Ohio State defense is playing awesome. The secondary is in blanket coverage on all their receivers and tackling well on Michigan's screens. Laurenitis is also all over the field, if only someone in the media could come up with some clever zoological name to describe how plays the game. Oh well.
13:10 Left in the Half
Brooks: Game over.
The thought of Michigan scoring more than 9 points is so inconceivable it will actually make your head explode if you try to even imagine it. Since Ohio State has now scored 14 points, they've won. Michigan's only hope now is to keep it within fifty.
12:07 Left in the Half
Uncle D: Well ABC just came back from the break showing a shot of the Ohio State drum line. Perhaps, this is where Michigan can contribute to the rivalry this afternoon at Halftime as they have a brash new drummer who plays by his own rhythm and own rules. Rumors are circulating however that he can't read music . . .
9:19 Left in the Half
Uncle D: Despite having it in front of them the entire half, Paul Maguire seems surprised when his colleague reveals the answer to the Aflac Trivia question. Also, if Michigan was the first school to seemingly ironically perform "Ohio," then why would Ohio State embrace it. That would be like Dave Coulier ditching his Popeye impression and singing a cover of "You Oughta Know"
Ohio State goes for it on 4th and 3 and Terrell Pryor throws a duck of a down field ball that looked like it was shot out of a T-Shirt gun. Michigan takes over.
Brooks: Thanks to my friends at Aflac, I just learned that the Michigan band was actually the first band to ever do Script Ohio. So take that, Buckeyes.
7:59 Left in the Half
Brooks: Michigan has a first down!
5:10 Left in the Half
Uncle D: Minor takes it down to the one yard line after a decent ball fake. He returns to the sideline where RichRod greets him by saying "nice run Slayton." It's 1st and Goal for Michigan however a 3 has already been put on the scoreboard.
2:51 Left in the Half
Brooks: That drive was huge for Michigan. 65 yard drive, Sheridan had a 14 yard pass and Brandon Minor had a number of really good carries. I give RichRod a lot of credit on that drive for going for it on fourth down twice, including once in the red zone. It's nice to see a coach who realizes field goals aren't going to win it in big games (Romeo Crennel, read that sentence again). The other big thing is that the drive gave the defense a break and a sign that it's worth it to keep fighting OSU.
Uncle D: Well, Michigan finally gains one yard on its fourth play at the goal line. Touchdown Brandon Minor. This is a big improvement as it usually takes six. The game is now 14-7 and we are treated to the first "Minor"/"Major" play-on words of the game from the anchor of ABC's College Football's B-Team
1:09 Left in the Half
Bitter looking sideline reporter Stacy Dale informs us that the Ohio State offense is now galvanized after the Michigan touchdown. After three plays, the special teams appears equally as excited to cover the ensuing punt
Halftime
Uncle D: RichRod is a genius. Intentionally taking a delay of game penalty is the kind of move that gets other coaches on the hot seat, however it gives his punter just enough room to bury Ohio St. on it's own 1, shattering any hopes they had to take a knee to end the half. Terrell Pryor luckily surges the pile forward on a QB sneak to run out the clock and preserve the 14-7 lead. Halftime.
Brooks: 14-7 OSU at half. I'm not exactly sure how the Michigan team led by Nick Sheridan has outscored last years team featuring Chad Henne, Jake Long and Mike Hart, but it has happened. That half was pretty much like watching a Scrubs re-run. When you come across Scrubs on Comedy Central, you are always like, "Eh, this works." You're never unsatisfied with the comedic performance and watching JD's sexuality slowly evolve over the course of the show, but on the other hand it's not exactly a show you'd want to own on DVD. That's pretty much this game. It's good, but it's not exactly exciting. Do you like Off Tackle running play and wide receiver screens? No, no one does. It's just a bunch of 3 yards and a cloud of black rubber field turf pellets of dust, and Jim Tressel turning another game into a battle of field position.
By the way, Jim Tressel's transformation into Lloyd Carr is definitely progressing well. Once again in a big game, his game plan is tight and extremely conservative. With Hartline and Robiskie going against the Michigan secondary, how do you not air it out more? They threw two bombs, but other than that and a couple of medium range throws in the middle, it's been all running backs and it's allowing Michigan to stay in the game. Look out, Columbus, after the first years of success with Jim you're on the verge of a series of 5 loss seasons and clever media folk spelling his name TresselLLLL
Halftime Chatter
Uncle D: Things are getting chippy between Louisville and West VA. The teams get into a quasi-shoving match at midfield prior to the game. John Saunders conjectures that it is a rivalry but Craig James responds as if to say "nope, they're just hopeless assholes, John"
Brooks: Thanks to my friends at Aflac, I just learned that the Michigan band was actually the first band to ever do Script Ohio. So take that, Buckeyes.
7:59 Left in the Half
Brooks: Michigan has a first down!
5:10 Left in the Half
Uncle D: Minor takes it down to the one yard line after a decent ball fake. He returns to the sideline where RichRod greets him by saying "nice run Slayton." It's 1st and Goal for Michigan however a 3 has already been put on the scoreboard.
2:51 Left in the Half
Brooks: That drive was huge for Michigan. 65 yard drive, Sheridan had a 14 yard pass and Brandon Minor had a number of really good carries. I give RichRod a lot of credit on that drive for going for it on fourth down twice, including once in the red zone. It's nice to see a coach who realizes field goals aren't going to win it in big games (Romeo Crennel, read that sentence again). The other big thing is that the drive gave the defense a break and a sign that it's worth it to keep fighting OSU.
Uncle D: Well, Michigan finally gains one yard on its fourth play at the goal line. Touchdown Brandon Minor. This is a big improvement as it usually takes six. The game is now 14-7 and we are treated to the first "Minor"/"Major" play-on words of the game from the anchor of ABC's College Football's B-Team
1:09 Left in the Half
Bitter looking sideline reporter Stacy Dale informs us that the Ohio State offense is now galvanized after the Michigan touchdown. After three plays, the special teams appears equally as excited to cover the ensuing punt
Halftime
Uncle D: RichRod is a genius. Intentionally taking a delay of game penalty is the kind of move that gets other coaches on the hot seat, however it gives his punter just enough room to bury Ohio St. on it's own 1, shattering any hopes they had to take a knee to end the half. Terrell Pryor luckily surges the pile forward on a QB sneak to run out the clock and preserve the 14-7 lead. Halftime.
Brooks: 14-7 OSU at half. I'm not exactly sure how the Michigan team led by Nick Sheridan has outscored last years team featuring Chad Henne, Jake Long and Mike Hart, but it has happened. That half was pretty much like watching a Scrubs re-run. When you come across Scrubs on Comedy Central, you are always like, "Eh, this works." You're never unsatisfied with the comedic performance and watching JD's sexuality slowly evolve over the course of the show, but on the other hand it's not exactly a show you'd want to own on DVD. That's pretty much this game. It's good, but it's not exactly exciting. Do you like Off Tackle running play and wide receiver screens? No, no one does. It's just a bunch of 3 yards and a cloud of black rubber field turf pellets of dust, and Jim Tressel turning another game into a battle of field position.
By the way, Jim Tressel's transformation into Lloyd Carr is definitely progressing well. Once again in a big game, his game plan is tight and extremely conservative. With Hartline and Robiskie going against the Michigan secondary, how do you not air it out more? They threw two bombs, but other than that and a couple of medium range throws in the middle, it's been all running backs and it's allowing Michigan to stay in the game. Look out, Columbus, after the first years of success with Jim you're on the verge of a series of 5 loss seasons and clever media folk spelling his name TresselLLLL
Halftime Chatter
Uncle D: Things are getting chippy between Louisville and West VA. The teams get into a quasi-shoving match at midfield prior to the game. John Saunders conjectures that it is a rivalry but Craig James responds as if to say "nope, they're just hopeless assholes, John"
A Halftime Conversation between Uncle D and Brooks revealed the following:
--Craig James is not famous for being a studio analyst or playing at SMU, he is famous for having a son who has caught two balls for Texas Tech this year, both 4 yard outs. James will now spend the rest of the game making a scouting reel of his son on his MacBook to either "Simply the Best" or "Do You Believe in Magic"--he has yet to decide.
--Only a few moments into the game, and Florida already has a 14-0 lead on the Citadel. My dad, a Citadel alum who went to Homecoming in Charleston last weekend, is sitting in his chair at home not surprised
--Big Ten Conference commercials boast stereotypical accuracy. The most recent ad depicts various shots of people wearing Big 10 school colors in various settings (ie white people in a cornfield & black people in an urban environs) It can now be said unequivocally that this recent campaign possesses a gritty realism television has not seen since the departure of "The Wire" or an inherent racism reminiscent of "All in the Family"
Incidentally, a Ohio St running back not named Beanie just went ghost face from midfield making the score 21-7. The announcers proclaim that is as quick as a 91 yard drive you can have . . . without a B Button
11:04 Left in the Third
Hoogs: I don't know what is more obnoxious: the fact that I am at work on Saturday and am forced to check in on college football periodically, or Ohio State's fight song. Seriously.
If Michigan doesn't score a touchdown on their next possession--on a big play that fires them up--then this game is over and we can start to get ready for the other Big 10 game that most of the nation doesn't care about today.
Brooks: Great opening to the half, I'm sure just what RichRod drew up on the board. Get the ball to the Ohio State forty, this time opt not to take the delay of game call just to keep things interesting, and pin Ohio State inside their own fifteen. Then, allow Ohio State to score on two running plays. Brilliant. You can't teach that, it's instinctual.
4:00 Left in the Third
Uncle D: Ray Small just took a punt 81 yards to the Michigan 10 yard line. Those viewers clamoring for an announcer to say something ridiculous along the lines of "Small makes a Big play" are decidedly disappointed as they are just treated to some commentary as to why he was recently suspended.
11:04 Left in the Third
Hoogs: I don't know what is more obnoxious: the fact that I am at work on Saturday and am forced to check in on college football periodically, or Ohio State's fight song. Seriously.
If Michigan doesn't score a touchdown on their next possession--on a big play that fires them up--then this game is over and we can start to get ready for the other Big 10 game that most of the nation doesn't care about today.
Brooks: Great opening to the half, I'm sure just what RichRod drew up on the board. Get the ball to the Ohio State forty, this time opt not to take the delay of game call just to keep things interesting, and pin Ohio State inside their own fifteen. Then, allow Ohio State to score on two running plays. Brilliant. You can't teach that, it's instinctual.
4:00 Left in the Third
Uncle D: Ray Small just took a punt 81 yards to the Michigan 10 yard line. Those viewers clamoring for an announcer to say something ridiculous along the lines of "Small makes a Big play" are decidedly disappointed as they are just treated to some commentary as to why he was recently suspended.
Touchdown to Robeiskie. 28-7 Ohio State. ABC shows pre-game coverage of Robeiskie greeting his parents on the field during Senior Day ceremonies. His father, Terry, is seen slipping his coaching resume to Jim Tressell.
Brooks: Ray Small just had a 81 yard punt return. Somewhere in downtown Cleveland, his father is still calling Tressel racist and insisting that the only reason his kid isn't in Heisman contention is that the OSU athletic department is involved in the most elaborate conspiracy theory since the OJ trial
2:04 Left in the Third
Hoogs: Nick(olette) Sheridan is down for the count. Won't say it's bad news for U of M, because it was never good news that he was their QB to begin with.
On to third string QB, Justin Feagin. The last name is pronounced Fay-genn. If he is anything like any of the other Fay-genns I know, then Big Blue is in Big Trouble.
End of the Third
Uncle D: History has been made as Pryor just overthrew a wide open Robieskie downfield. The two players just stare at each other for 10 seconds as to mutually acknowledge that that ball is usually 10 yards behind the receiver, who has to then wait for it, and gets hung out to dry.
Brooks: Ray Small just had a 81 yard punt return. Somewhere in downtown Cleveland, his father is still calling Tressel racist and insisting that the only reason his kid isn't in Heisman contention is that the OSU athletic department is involved in the most elaborate conspiracy theory since the OJ trial
2:04 Left in the Third
Hoogs: Nick(olette) Sheridan is down for the count. Won't say it's bad news for U of M, because it was never good news that he was their QB to begin with.
On to third string QB, Justin Feagin. The last name is pronounced Fay-genn. If he is anything like any of the other Fay-genns I know, then Big Blue is in Big Trouble.
End of the Third
Uncle D: History has been made as Pryor just overthrew a wide open Robieskie downfield. The two players just stare at each other for 10 seconds as to mutually acknowledge that that ball is usually 10 yards behind the receiver, who has to then wait for it, and gets hung out to dry.
Things immediately return to normal as, on the ensuing play, Pryor throws a ball at least 12 yards behind Schatzenbacher for a big play that could have been bigger, if he didn't have to sprint to come back and catch it.
Brooks: I'll spare you the analysis. Let's just leave it to this image: in the closing montage of the quarter, ABC was only able to put in a single Michigan highlight in the midst of all the Ohio State touchdowns. That highlight was the Roughing the Punter penalty Michigan drew to extend one drive by three more utterly meaningless plays.
13:08 Left in the Game
Uncle D: After another Ohio St. score to make it 35-7, Michigan avoids another 3 and out by fumbling it away on the ensuing kick-off. Todd Boekman peels himself off the bench and throws a touchdown on his first attempt. More impressive than the throw, is the number of Buckeye stickers he has on his helmet considering he hasn't played all year. He must have not returned his starter's key to the supply room. 42-7 Ohio State, douchers with smeared face paint go apeshit.
6:00 Left in RichRod's Tenure at Michigan
Uncle D: Bob Griese spends five minutes praising Todd Boekman as if he were the quarterbacking son he never had. Somewhere in Tampa, Brian is crying. Not over his father's apparent disapproval or even the score, but because he is currently backing up a man who thinks his football jersey makes him look matronly.
3:38 and Counting Left
Brooks: I just learned that Ohio State gives gold pants to seniors who beat Michigan in their final collegiate regular season game, and have done so for the past 75 years. Even Bob Griese is confused by this tradition
Uncle D: In a similar, yet unrelated story, Archie Griffin has been wearing gold pants since 1979 . . .
Re-Cap
Uncle D: Here is a rundown of what happened today:
13:08 Left in the Game
Uncle D: After another Ohio St. score to make it 35-7, Michigan avoids another 3 and out by fumbling it away on the ensuing kick-off. Todd Boekman peels himself off the bench and throws a touchdown on his first attempt. More impressive than the throw, is the number of Buckeye stickers he has on his helmet considering he hasn't played all year. He must have not returned his starter's key to the supply room. 42-7 Ohio State, douchers with smeared face paint go apeshit.
6:00 Left in RichRod's Tenure at Michigan
Uncle D: Bob Griese spends five minutes praising Todd Boekman as if he were the quarterbacking son he never had. Somewhere in Tampa, Brian is crying. Not over his father's apparent disapproval or even the score, but because he is currently backing up a man who thinks his football jersey makes him look matronly.
3:38 and Counting Left
Brooks: I just learned that Ohio State gives gold pants to seniors who beat Michigan in their final collegiate regular season game, and have done so for the past 75 years. Even Bob Griese is confused by this tradition
Uncle D: In a similar, yet unrelated story, Archie Griffin has been wearing gold pants since 1979 . . .
Re-Cap
Uncle D: Here is a rundown of what happened today:
--Paul Maguire left his keys to the game on his dresser.
--RichRod appeared confused at the start of the game as he devised a game plan for UCONN.
--Jim Tressell has creepy sunglasses that make him look like a Batman villain whose name I can't recall right now.
--After axing Pushing Daisies and Dirty Sexy Money, ABC is on the verge of canceling the Big 10.
Brooks: Paul MacGuire closes another flawless television performance with the following: "Those guys were really whacking it down there."
Too easy
Where Does This Fit In?
Sweater Vest Massacre
Too easy
Where Does This Fit In?
1. 
Tiananmen Square Massacre
2.
Boston Massacre
3.
St. Bartholomew's Day Massacre
4.
Columbine Massacre
5.
Sweater Vest Massacre
Friday, November 21, 2008
My Keys to the Game, 11-21-08
Not that anyone asked, but here are my keys to the games I'm most interested in this weekend.
Michigan v. Ohio State
I never thought that The Game would ever be so under the radar in my lifetime. But with Michigan way down, Ohio State not in the national title picture, and the Big 10 doing its best impression of Corky from Facts Of Life by keeping its season finale two weeks before everyone else, no one seems to really care about The Game. Here's what I'm watching for:
Michigan Front 7 v. Beanie Wells: Just pop in the tape from last year, and you'll see why. He ran for 222 yards and 2 TDs in a 14-3 Buckeyes win in Ann Arbor. I find it hard to believe that Ohio State is going to put the game in a freshmen QB's hands, so Pryor will have a very vanilla gameplan (note: I refuse to use the phrase, "Hand a Freshmen the keys." That sounds like something that Mark May would say, and since I'm a human being capable of basic cognition, I'm above that). They kept it very conservative in the Penn State game, and Pryor has seen absolutely nothing like the pressure he'll face this week from the media, teammates, or fellow students. It's going to be a healthy dose of 2002 Tressel offense-- a lot of runs between the tackles.
Nick Sheridan: The Michigan offense is awful. Awful. Second to last in the Big 10 in any offensive category with an offensive coach is ridiculous, let alone 10th in total offense. If that wasn't bad enough, they now put in the backup QB who has already lost the job once this season. Mgoblog.com has pointed out that the run game hasn't been awful this year (avg. 4 yards per carry), so all the pressure is on Sheridan to throw passes, but here's the kicker: throw them accurately and to the right team. It's the holy trinity of offensive competency, and Michigan would like to have it once this season.
Prediction: Too scared to say out loud what will happen.
Texas Tech v. Oklahoma
If I hear the phrase "de facto National Semi-Final Game," I might bomb Bristol, CT. It's stupid, it implies there are four teams and that all four are one game away from the National Title game. So until we get teams 1-4 playing each other in the Big 12/SEC/ACC title games, it's not a semi final. Dear lord that infuriates me. Stop thinking you're subtle and clever when you say this, media, we get it, you want a playoff.
Texas Tech O Line: They have been unreal this year, virtually giving Harrell all the time he could possibly want to find a receiver. They already have enough talent at WR, including our pick for the Heisman in Crabtree, and now Harrell can wait for 5 or 6 seconds for any of his 5 targets to get open. If they can keep it up this week and force OU to start bringing blitzers and prevent OU from dropping 7 into coverage, Harrell will eat them alive.
Austin Cox: Oklahoma's defense has not been the same since Ryan Reynolds came out with a torn ACL in the Texas game. Oklahoma was a solid but not great defense, since then it's been servicable at best. There numbers look bad because they give up a lot of points when their offense has already won the game, but the fact is they need a stellar defensive effort to beat Texas Tech. If Cox plays the game of his life and we see the defense that played the first half of the Texas game, then Oklahoma will walk away in the middle of the national title picture.
Prediction: OU 113, TT 111
Washington v. Washington State
Yep, this is the third most interesting game of the weekend. Want to know why? Because this might very well be the worst game in the history of Divionson 1-A (I'll call it FBS right after Slash and Axl go on tour together, playing nothing but Appetite for Destruction, along with Patience and November Rain, and dedicate Sweet Child O Mine to me every night for an entire tour. Onus is on you, Axl). That's right: this is the arguably the worst game since Georgia Tech beat Cumberland College 222-0 in 1916. Let's go to my key matchup in the Battle for the Apple Cup.
God's Sense of Mercy v. God's Sense of Irony: that's right, there is nothing any player can do on the field. When you have two BCS schools playing each other with a combined total of 0 wins against D-1A (Onus is on you, Axl, will you deliver?), the players cease to be a factor. On the one hand, God could mercifully deliver a great game for these fans. After all, if you are so dedicated to your school to travel to his game, you should at least be entertained. On the other hand, God has shown us his sick sense of humor many times before-- the Duckbilled Platypus, giving Rosie O'Donnell getting a live primetime series, the entire state of North Dakota-- and he could reveal it again in this game. Can you imagine the hilarity that would ensue if this game ended in a tie? What if both teams somehow walk away from this game winless? I know there's OT, but just suspend disbelief and imagine with me. Tie game, and then lightening delays OT so they just give up? Actually, you know what, the true act of mercy by God for the fans would be for both teams to play the game to a 0-0 tie with running clock and no halftime. Be merciful to your fans and let them leave after just an hour. My god, this will be the athletic equivalent of the nuclear war. I'm not sure who wins, but at the end of the day, we'll all wish our eyes had melted.
My only wish for this game is that we should add to the suspense by allowing the winning coach to fire the vanquished leader. Let's be honest, if you lose to either of these teams you deserve to be fired, and honestly it would give the winning coach a few seconds of joy before they are also ultimately fired next week.
Prediction: Washington 2, Wazzou 0. It's not a tie, but I also don't believe either team is competent enough to score, but incompetent enough to snap a punt through the uprights
Michigan v. Ohio State
I never thought that The Game would ever be so under the radar in my lifetime. But with Michigan way down, Ohio State not in the national title picture, and the Big 10 doing its best impression of Corky from Facts Of Life by keeping its season finale two weeks before everyone else, no one seems to really care about The Game. Here's what I'm watching for:
Michigan Front 7 v. Beanie Wells: Just pop in the tape from last year, and you'll see why. He ran for 222 yards and 2 TDs in a 14-3 Buckeyes win in Ann Arbor. I find it hard to believe that Ohio State is going to put the game in a freshmen QB's hands, so Pryor will have a very vanilla gameplan (note: I refuse to use the phrase, "Hand a Freshmen the keys." That sounds like something that Mark May would say, and since I'm a human being capable of basic cognition, I'm above that). They kept it very conservative in the Penn State game, and Pryor has seen absolutely nothing like the pressure he'll face this week from the media, teammates, or fellow students. It's going to be a healthy dose of 2002 Tressel offense-- a lot of runs between the tackles.
Nick Sheridan: The Michigan offense is awful. Awful. Second to last in the Big 10 in any offensive category with an offensive coach is ridiculous, let alone 10th in total offense. If that wasn't bad enough, they now put in the backup QB who has already lost the job once this season. Mgoblog.com has pointed out that the run game hasn't been awful this year (avg. 4 yards per carry), so all the pressure is on Sheridan to throw passes, but here's the kicker: throw them accurately and to the right team. It's the holy trinity of offensive competency, and Michigan would like to have it once this season.
Prediction: Too scared to say out loud what will happen.
Texas Tech v. Oklahoma
If I hear the phrase "de facto National Semi-Final Game," I might bomb Bristol, CT. It's stupid, it implies there are four teams and that all four are one game away from the National Title game. So until we get teams 1-4 playing each other in the Big 12/SEC/ACC title games, it's not a semi final. Dear lord that infuriates me. Stop thinking you're subtle and clever when you say this, media, we get it, you want a playoff.
Texas Tech O Line: They have been unreal this year, virtually giving Harrell all the time he could possibly want to find a receiver. They already have enough talent at WR, including our pick for the Heisman in Crabtree, and now Harrell can wait for 5 or 6 seconds for any of his 5 targets to get open. If they can keep it up this week and force OU to start bringing blitzers and prevent OU from dropping 7 into coverage, Harrell will eat them alive.
Austin Cox: Oklahoma's defense has not been the same since Ryan Reynolds came out with a torn ACL in the Texas game. Oklahoma was a solid but not great defense, since then it's been servicable at best. There numbers look bad because they give up a lot of points when their offense has already won the game, but the fact is they need a stellar defensive effort to beat Texas Tech. If Cox plays the game of his life and we see the defense that played the first half of the Texas game, then Oklahoma will walk away in the middle of the national title picture.
Prediction: OU 113, TT 111
Washington v. Washington State
Yep, this is the third most interesting game of the weekend. Want to know why? Because this might very well be the worst game in the history of Divionson 1-A (I'll call it FBS right after Slash and Axl go on tour together, playing nothing but Appetite for Destruction, along with Patience and November Rain, and dedicate Sweet Child O Mine to me every night for an entire tour. Onus is on you, Axl). That's right: this is the arguably the worst game since Georgia Tech beat Cumberland College 222-0 in 1916. Let's go to my key matchup in the Battle for the Apple Cup.
God's Sense of Mercy v. God's Sense of Irony: that's right, there is nothing any player can do on the field. When you have two BCS schools playing each other with a combined total of 0 wins against D-1A (Onus is on you, Axl, will you deliver?), the players cease to be a factor. On the one hand, God could mercifully deliver a great game for these fans. After all, if you are so dedicated to your school to travel to his game, you should at least be entertained. On the other hand, God has shown us his sick sense of humor many times before-- the Duckbilled Platypus, giving Rosie O'Donnell getting a live primetime series, the entire state of North Dakota-- and he could reveal it again in this game. Can you imagine the hilarity that would ensue if this game ended in a tie? What if both teams somehow walk away from this game winless? I know there's OT, but just suspend disbelief and imagine with me. Tie game, and then lightening delays OT so they just give up? Actually, you know what, the true act of mercy by God for the fans would be for both teams to play the game to a 0-0 tie with running clock and no halftime. Be merciful to your fans and let them leave after just an hour. My god, this will be the athletic equivalent of the nuclear war. I'm not sure who wins, but at the end of the day, we'll all wish our eyes had melted.
My only wish for this game is that we should add to the suspense by allowing the winning coach to fire the vanquished leader. Let's be honest, if you lose to either of these teams you deserve to be fired, and honestly it would give the winning coach a few seconds of joy before they are also ultimately fired next week.
Prediction: Washington 2, Wazzou 0. It's not a tie, but I also don't believe either team is competent enough to score, but incompetent enough to snap a punt through the uprights
Thursday, November 20, 2008
My History with "The Game"
I grew up in a typical home as a kid. My family was moderately conservative in the upbringing of my two siblings and me, which led to the usual, safe, stable childhood. No divorces, no fights, nothing like that. All in all it was a great way to grow up.
Except in 1996.
In 1996, I was given the greatest gift that any male that grew up in Big 10 country could ever receive: a ticket to the Michigan-Ohio State game. Growing up in Cleveland, the last weekend of the regular season, always the week before Thanksgiving, was hallowed ground. I vividly remember the first game that I watched when I was 5 years old. From that moment on, I was a college football addict and dreamed of one day making it to “The Game.” I was fourteen and a freshman in high school when my friend David invited me to go with his step-dad and uncle.
This also wasn’t just any game: Ohio State was undefeated and the #2 team in the country. The game was the last obstacle for the Buckeyes to overcome to make it to their first national championship since 1970. And Ohio State was stacked that year. They had a returning QB in Joe Germaine, the pocket passer, and could also mix in the more mobile freshman, Stanley Jackson as well. They also featured Orlando Pace at left tackle, Heisman Trophy candidate Eddie George at running back, David Boston at wide receiver, and Shawn Springs at cornerback—all four of whom went on to be first round picks in the NFL draft. This was going to be the greatest game for any Buckeye state resident my age to see: the first national champion home town team in my lifetime.
This is where the story deviates from the typical path. I’m from Ohio. I’m a huge fan of Ohio sports, culture, and economics. My mom was born and raised in Columbus and still lives in Ohio. I am also a Michigan fan. My best friend growing up was from a Michigan family (his grandfather was Bo Schembechler’s Defensive Coordinator for years), and they converted me. I savored watching Cleveland natives Desmond Howard and Elvis Grbac tear the Buckeyes apart. The John Cooper coaching years were some of the best of my life. In my room growing up my old Hutch football helmet with those beautiful wings is still prominently displayed. In 1997 I made my first trip to Ann Arbor for a hockey camp and was allowed to walk into the Big House for the first time. I almost cried it was so beautiful, and only when Michigan hockey great Blake Sloan threatened to tackle me did I give up my attempt to steal grass from the stadium. When I got to go to my first game in the Big House two years ago, I could barely sleep the night before I was so excited. So yeah, I’m a fan.
But it was not just the fact that I was a fan. It was the fact that I had the opportunity to do what every true fan really wants to do: be the fan in your rival’s home stadium. I was going to be “That Guy”: decked out in Maize and Blue, screaming Hail to the Victors, single handedly willing my Wolverines and second year coach Lloyd Carr to victory with every cheer, taunt and celebration.
Unfortunately, this is where my upbringing comes in to play. My parents were scared to death about this trip. I am not necessarily the brightest or most rational person about sports today, so imagine what I was like with the hormones and ignorance of a fourteen year old. Realizing my general tendency to “that guy-ness,” my Mom made me show her what I was going to wear during the game. I showed her my blue jeans, Michigan t-shirt, Michigan sweatshirt, Michigan jacket, and Michigan hat. My mom lost it.
“Do you have any idea what you’re walking into? Do you have any idea at all? I have been to this game—they will literally beat you up if they see you dressed like that. They don’t care if you’re a kid, they’re all so drunk they will attack anyone wearing Michigan stuff. No, you can’t wear any of it!” This led to, of course, a fight that was much longer and vicious than it needed to be, ending with the “compromise” of being allowed to wear “Blue” jeans to show my pride, and then a bunch of high school athletic clothes. Words cannot describe my disappointment. My only saving grace was that I was able to sneak my Michigan pin into my bag, but was still so scared of my mother that I would only wear it underneath my jacket in Columbus (yes, my mom could somehow watch me from 140 miles away. You learn how to be a ninja at liberal arts colleges in Schenectady, NY).
The game itself is not as vivid as I wish it was, partly because of time, mostly because at that age I figured I would go to the game at least 14 other times in the next twenty years so I didn’t have to take everything in. It was back before the additions to the stadium, so the Horseshoe was still a horseshoe. I remember seeing the scoreboard light up every time George ran the ball as it welcomed everyone in the stadium to “Orlando’s House of Pancakes” to celebrate each of his blocks. I remember sitting in stunned silence throughout the first half. Ohio State dominated the clock, Lloyd Carr’s offense looked inept (phew, thank goodness he grew out of that phase, huh), but the Michigan defense paid tribute to the NFL with a great bend-don’t-break performance. Ohio State was held to 3 field goals, so 9-0 at half. That, is Big 10 offensive football. I watched Script Ohio, which growing up in Ohio you were told was on the beauty scale somewhere between the Mona Lisa and seeing the naked body of Helen of Troy, and felt completely underwhelmed. Marching bands confuse me.
The second half was completely different. Somehow, Michigan rallied around Brian Greise. Long before he was the best QB in NFL history in terms of QB Rating, and long before he signed one of the three worst contracts in Denver Broncos history, he took this team to greatness in Columbus. Field goal by Remy (really parents, that’s the name you come up with?) Hamilton cut the game to 9-3. It is at this moment my lifelong struggle with restless leg syndrome began. Believing that victory was again possible and in a beautiful rust belt late fall afternoon, my right leg started twitching non-stop for the rest of the game.
The defense held Eddie George in check in the second half, and I could feel the fans starting to change their demeanor around me. As a Cleveland fan, I now realize that I was around a fan base that could already see where this game was going. You have to remember that this game was during the John Cooper era; the era of a coach who finished his career 1-8-1 against Michigan. Everyone around me realized the Buckeyes were about to blow it, as if they had skipped to the last page of the script and saw the ending. I did not know this, but after a 69 yard touchdown pass to Tai Streets (who was drafted that spring to replace Jerry Rice in San Francisco, and we wonder why that franchise has fallen off the reservation), their fears were realized. 10-9 Wolverines.
At this point, I’m beside myself. I’m so happy I want to do nothing more than stand up and Hail to my Victors in a song-like manner. But I heard the guy behind me shout, “If I see one more Michigan fucker stand up, I’m going to kick his ass!” I fully expected the parents around me to tell the guy to cool it, cut out the profanity, remind them that this is a family environment.
Instead, I hear my chaperone—my friend’s stepdad, my protector for the day-- say, “Fuck Michigan.” Wow.
Suddenly, I’m not nearly confident enough to do anything public. However, I still had that button I snuck into game under my coat. This button was special because it not only proudly displayed my football allegiances in the nipple area, like a mother would suckle her child, but it also played the Michigan fight song. Paying homage to my forefathers of middle-class and white heritage, I decided to go passive aggressive on the Buckeyes fans. I played the fight song during the TV timeout following Streets’ TD. I played it after first downs. After defensive stops. While the teams huddled. Any chance I got, I played that song. The fans around me grew infuriated since they couldn’t figure out who had it (remember, it was hidden beneath my windbreaker). I loved every minute of it—every F bomb, every threat, every scream by a Buckeye fan.
Late in the fourth, Michigan put it away with another field goal by Hamilton, this one being arguably the ugliest kick I have ever seen. I still think the ball went between the posts sideways, and it cleared the crossbar by maybe a yard. But it went in, Michigan won 13-9. Michigan not only won the game, but they knocked Ohio State out of the National Title game. Even better was that the Athletic Department still tried to pass out roses to the Ohio State players and fans to celebrate since they were still technically going to the Rose Bowl. Nothing made the victory sweeter than watching those players look at the roses and realize that no celebration could possibly be emptier.
I have no great conclusion to this story, other than to say that this was one of the greatest sport experiences of my life. No drive back from Columbus was ever shorter, few victories in my life have even been sweeter. It gives me hope every year during this weekend. Even when Michigan was awful and Ohio State was on the cusp of greatness, the rivalry took over and the Maize and Blue showed they had more fight in them than everyone thought with a new-ish coach. It happened when I was in the stands, and it can definitely happen again on Saturday. 3-8, second to last in the Big Ten in total offense? It doesn’t matter in this game. Hear that, RichRod, now is your time! Go Blue!
Except in 1996.
In 1996, I was given the greatest gift that any male that grew up in Big 10 country could ever receive: a ticket to the Michigan-Ohio State game. Growing up in Cleveland, the last weekend of the regular season, always the week before Thanksgiving, was hallowed ground. I vividly remember the first game that I watched when I was 5 years old. From that moment on, I was a college football addict and dreamed of one day making it to “The Game.” I was fourteen and a freshman in high school when my friend David invited me to go with his step-dad and uncle.
This also wasn’t just any game: Ohio State was undefeated and the #2 team in the country. The game was the last obstacle for the Buckeyes to overcome to make it to their first national championship since 1970. And Ohio State was stacked that year. They had a returning QB in Joe Germaine, the pocket passer, and could also mix in the more mobile freshman, Stanley Jackson as well. They also featured Orlando Pace at left tackle, Heisman Trophy candidate Eddie George at running back, David Boston at wide receiver, and Shawn Springs at cornerback—all four of whom went on to be first round picks in the NFL draft. This was going to be the greatest game for any Buckeye state resident my age to see: the first national champion home town team in my lifetime.
This is where the story deviates from the typical path. I’m from Ohio. I’m a huge fan of Ohio sports, culture, and economics. My mom was born and raised in Columbus and still lives in Ohio. I am also a Michigan fan. My best friend growing up was from a Michigan family (his grandfather was Bo Schembechler’s Defensive Coordinator for years), and they converted me. I savored watching Cleveland natives Desmond Howard and Elvis Grbac tear the Buckeyes apart. The John Cooper coaching years were some of the best of my life. In my room growing up my old Hutch football helmet with those beautiful wings is still prominently displayed. In 1997 I made my first trip to Ann Arbor for a hockey camp and was allowed to walk into the Big House for the first time. I almost cried it was so beautiful, and only when Michigan hockey great Blake Sloan threatened to tackle me did I give up my attempt to steal grass from the stadium. When I got to go to my first game in the Big House two years ago, I could barely sleep the night before I was so excited. So yeah, I’m a fan.
But it was not just the fact that I was a fan. It was the fact that I had the opportunity to do what every true fan really wants to do: be the fan in your rival’s home stadium. I was going to be “That Guy”: decked out in Maize and Blue, screaming Hail to the Victors, single handedly willing my Wolverines and second year coach Lloyd Carr to victory with every cheer, taunt and celebration.
Unfortunately, this is where my upbringing comes in to play. My parents were scared to death about this trip. I am not necessarily the brightest or most rational person about sports today, so imagine what I was like with the hormones and ignorance of a fourteen year old. Realizing my general tendency to “that guy-ness,” my Mom made me show her what I was going to wear during the game. I showed her my blue jeans, Michigan t-shirt, Michigan sweatshirt, Michigan jacket, and Michigan hat. My mom lost it.
“Do you have any idea what you’re walking into? Do you have any idea at all? I have been to this game—they will literally beat you up if they see you dressed like that. They don’t care if you’re a kid, they’re all so drunk they will attack anyone wearing Michigan stuff. No, you can’t wear any of it!” This led to, of course, a fight that was much longer and vicious than it needed to be, ending with the “compromise” of being allowed to wear “Blue” jeans to show my pride, and then a bunch of high school athletic clothes. Words cannot describe my disappointment. My only saving grace was that I was able to sneak my Michigan pin into my bag, but was still so scared of my mother that I would only wear it underneath my jacket in Columbus (yes, my mom could somehow watch me from 140 miles away. You learn how to be a ninja at liberal arts colleges in Schenectady, NY).
The game itself is not as vivid as I wish it was, partly because of time, mostly because at that age I figured I would go to the game at least 14 other times in the next twenty years so I didn’t have to take everything in. It was back before the additions to the stadium, so the Horseshoe was still a horseshoe. I remember seeing the scoreboard light up every time George ran the ball as it welcomed everyone in the stadium to “Orlando’s House of Pancakes” to celebrate each of his blocks. I remember sitting in stunned silence throughout the first half. Ohio State dominated the clock, Lloyd Carr’s offense looked inept (phew, thank goodness he grew out of that phase, huh), but the Michigan defense paid tribute to the NFL with a great bend-don’t-break performance. Ohio State was held to 3 field goals, so 9-0 at half. That, is Big 10 offensive football. I watched Script Ohio, which growing up in Ohio you were told was on the beauty scale somewhere between the Mona Lisa and seeing the naked body of Helen of Troy, and felt completely underwhelmed. Marching bands confuse me.
The second half was completely different. Somehow, Michigan rallied around Brian Greise. Long before he was the best QB in NFL history in terms of QB Rating, and long before he signed one of the three worst contracts in Denver Broncos history, he took this team to greatness in Columbus. Field goal by Remy (really parents, that’s the name you come up with?) Hamilton cut the game to 9-3. It is at this moment my lifelong struggle with restless leg syndrome began. Believing that victory was again possible and in a beautiful rust belt late fall afternoon, my right leg started twitching non-stop for the rest of the game.
The defense held Eddie George in check in the second half, and I could feel the fans starting to change their demeanor around me. As a Cleveland fan, I now realize that I was around a fan base that could already see where this game was going. You have to remember that this game was during the John Cooper era; the era of a coach who finished his career 1-8-1 against Michigan. Everyone around me realized the Buckeyes were about to blow it, as if they had skipped to the last page of the script and saw the ending. I did not know this, but after a 69 yard touchdown pass to Tai Streets (who was drafted that spring to replace Jerry Rice in San Francisco, and we wonder why that franchise has fallen off the reservation), their fears were realized. 10-9 Wolverines.
At this point, I’m beside myself. I’m so happy I want to do nothing more than stand up and Hail to my Victors in a song-like manner. But I heard the guy behind me shout, “If I see one more Michigan fucker stand up, I’m going to kick his ass!” I fully expected the parents around me to tell the guy to cool it, cut out the profanity, remind them that this is a family environment.
Instead, I hear my chaperone—my friend’s stepdad, my protector for the day-- say, “Fuck Michigan.” Wow.
Suddenly, I’m not nearly confident enough to do anything public. However, I still had that button I snuck into game under my coat. This button was special because it not only proudly displayed my football allegiances in the nipple area, like a mother would suckle her child, but it also played the Michigan fight song. Paying homage to my forefathers of middle-class and white heritage, I decided to go passive aggressive on the Buckeyes fans. I played the fight song during the TV timeout following Streets’ TD. I played it after first downs. After defensive stops. While the teams huddled. Any chance I got, I played that song. The fans around me grew infuriated since they couldn’t figure out who had it (remember, it was hidden beneath my windbreaker). I loved every minute of it—every F bomb, every threat, every scream by a Buckeye fan.
Late in the fourth, Michigan put it away with another field goal by Hamilton, this one being arguably the ugliest kick I have ever seen. I still think the ball went between the posts sideways, and it cleared the crossbar by maybe a yard. But it went in, Michigan won 13-9. Michigan not only won the game, but they knocked Ohio State out of the National Title game. Even better was that the Athletic Department still tried to pass out roses to the Ohio State players and fans to celebrate since they were still technically going to the Rose Bowl. Nothing made the victory sweeter than watching those players look at the roses and realize that no celebration could possibly be emptier.
I have no great conclusion to this story, other than to say that this was one of the greatest sport experiences of my life. No drive back from Columbus was ever shorter, few victories in my life have even been sweeter. It gives me hope every year during this weekend. Even when Michigan was awful and Ohio State was on the cusp of greatness, the rivalry took over and the Maize and Blue showed they had more fight in them than everyone thought with a new-ish coach. It happened when I was in the stands, and it can definitely happen again on Saturday. 3-8, second to last in the Big Ten in total offense? It doesn’t matter in this game. Hear that, RichRod, now is your time! Go Blue!
Monday, November 17, 2008
Let's Define What A Rivalry Is
So, we have officially entered "Rivalry Week" on ESPN. These are the biggest games of the year for teams, the games the fans are most blinded(ly drunk) about their opponents, the games that I watch every year and think "Man, am I friends with Morgan Freeman? Because this game is definitely going on my bucket list!" In fact, these have gotten so big, TV has actually expanded rivalry weekend to include a second Saturday. Even this deluxe edition with special features is not enough for the media, however, as it seems that the guys on GameDay, SI and other sites play the rivalry card every week. Last week, Foxsports claimed that Oklahoma-Texas Tech was a rivalry "because Texas Tech has won two out of the last three meetings." That's it? Winning twice makes a match-up a rivalry?
I spent 10 minutes brainstorming games I remember different media outlets billing as rivalry games, and came up with 40 without much thought. 40? Almost one per state, are you kidding me?! I checked out two random teams fan sites-- Tennessee and Clemson-- and they had a combined listing of 10 rivalry games. This has got to stop. It's time to establish what a rivalry is, and who actually falls into these categories.
Defining a Rivalry
Not every game is a rivalry. Not every conference game is a rivalry. Not every big game is a rivalry. Not every game the pits two teams from the same or adjacent states is a rivalry. Rivalries are special and rarely occur. We insult the true rivalries by using this term so loosely.
1) Both Sides Must Agree this is a Rivalry
This sounds basic, but it is pivotal in deciding what is a rivalry and what is simply a game that you think is big because you hate the other team. Are you listening Texas Tech, Minnesota, Michigan State and everyone else like you? You may hate Texas, Michigan, and Notre Dame respectively, you may have played them for decades, you may stab photos of the opposing coach with disease infected needles, you may even use the opposing teams logo for toilet paper the week of the game. Hate does not necessarily create a rivalry. It's important, but it doesn't create the rivalry. Both sides have to agree that it's a rivalry. That means that the other team must hate you as much as you hate them, which also means that both sides legitimately have a chance to win each year. If you're Missouri and haven't won in Texas in over a century, you cannot call it a rivalry.
For further evidence, let's turn to Saved By the Bell. Particularly, Senior Year (season 4), episode 62, entitled "The Bayside Triangle" (original airdate: 26 Sept. 1992). While I am certain you all also had no life in middle school and recall this beautiful written, 24 minute teen drama, allow me to refresh you: in order to earn her acceptance into the Fashion Institute of Technology-- FYI it is actually a real school in case, like me, you thought Peter Engel Productions made it up-- Lisa has to put on a fashion show for the admissions council. Sensing that shenanigans were certain to ensue, Lisa turns to Zack for help. Zack once again demonstrates his ability to think outside the box by selecting The Max as the location for said show (tragically, Ed Alonzo's magic was once again edited out post-production). Formulaic episode, right? Wrong! Here's the kicker: Zack and Lisa end up making out! Screech, who had strong, strong feelings for Lisa, challenges Zack to a fight and famously rips his shirt. What happens in the fight? I believe you'll find out after you drop $29.95 at Amazon for the complete series collection. Peter Engel: this is not free advertising, hint hint.
Why do I bring this up? The next time Zack went after a girl, do you think he was really worried about Screech? Do you think that he waited for Screech to fall in love with Violet (a young Tori Spelling), and then went after Violet to spite Screech? No. Zack never thought about it again. Want to know why? Because no matter how much he hated Zack, Screech was never a rival in Zack's eyes. Screech could never beat him, Zack wasn't afraid or hated Screech, so it's not a rivalry. Here that Texas Tech fans? You are not AC Slater. You are an awkward, adolescent Dustin Diamond. Pre-porn yes, but also pre-pubescent.
2) There Can Be Only One Rivalry
This is a huge factor in my definition of a rivalry. You cannot have more than one rival. You can have one rival, and then as many number of games that you either hate the opponent or really want to win each year as you want. Here that, basically every school in the SEC right now? Magically, it seems that every time that the Coach, the Host, the Heisman Winner, and the Body show up at an SEC game, amazingly, the home fans start trumpeting what a rivalry the game is. LSU v. Kentucky? Historic! Remember, LSU once beat Kentucky four years ago on a Hail Mary! Vanderbilt v. Arkansas? How could that not conjure up images of National Title games past!? No. I'm only allowed one wife, one religion, and one chance to lose my virginity. So, until I can watch three of my wives make love to each other while I say the Hail Mary during my Bar Mitzvah in order to receive the powers of Hera, you only get one rival. During the Cold War, our only rival was the Soviet Union. Yes, you are only 90 miles away and hate us for our freedom and blockading capabilities, Cuba, but at the end of the day Rocky fought Ivan Drago, not Juan Ramirez.
In fact, if you are a true rivalry, that week before you play your rival almost becomes a season in and of itself. Ultimately, you want your school to go undefeated both seasons: the first ten weeks of the year and in the rivalry game. However, losing during the season will not lead to a coach getting Ty Willinghamed. Losing the rivalry season will--just ask John Cooper's agent. When you hear fans say they'd rather go winless and beat (insert team name here) than go undefeated but lose to (insert same team name here), then you have a rivalry. The best example of this is the Army-Navy game. Ask anyone who went played for, coached for, or attended these schools what is most important to them. Without a doubt, they'll say beating the other one (sorry Air Force, you're Screech in this group of adorable and spunky teens). In fact, this is such a rivalry, that the weights that the players on Army use all off season say "BEAT NAVY" all across them. Same with Navy. That's obsession-- that's a rivalry.
3) It Must Be Historic
Rivalries are timeless. In order to be timeless, your rivalry has to be older than me, and preferably existed before my Dad graduated from high school. This means the game must predate 1970. Sorry, every team in the state of Florida, this means you fall short of the list. Florida State didn't matter until after Bobby "Gee Whiz" Bowden arrived in 1976, Miami didn't matter until Howard Schellenberger arrived in 1979, Florida didn't matter until Steve "I'm a Giant Penis" Spurrier arrived in 1989. Big games? Yes. Games that over the last twenty years have had national title significance? Yes. Old players in wheel chairs with emphysema tanks desperately trying to build up the effort to say to some 18 year old recruit, "What's your record against Miami?" Nope, sorry. Schools like the Florida colleges have to wait until my kids are talking intelligently about football with me to be a rivalry. It's not just Florida, people confuse recent games for rivalries all the time. For years, I used to think that Michigan-Notre Dame was a rivalry. When I started watching in the late 80s, it seemed like a rivalry because every year that two teams were ranked in the top 5 when they met. This match up didn't start until the 80s, however, so even though I will punch Raghib "Crotch Rocket" Ismail ( Step 1: punch in face; Step 2) punch in balls; Step 3) repeat until arm grows tired or police use tasers) if I ever meet him for the pain he caused me as a youth, it's not a rivalry.
Along with this point, you also have to play the team every year for it to be a rivalry. I had to add this one after Texas and Arkansas played this year. Yes, I understand you were conference opponents in the Southwestern Conference back when we as a nation were concerned with "who shot JR." Congratulations. I'm not worried about that anymore nor do I care about your game. I have better things to worry about. Things like whether Tony Soprano died in the final episode (note to self, add spoiler alert at start of previous pop culture reference) and whether Sarah Connor can possibly protect her son in the TV series long enough for him to survive, become Christian Bale, and lead the human race when T4 the movie hits theaters in 2009. Rivalries are played every year. Big games can take a season or decade off every now and again.
4) It Should Have National Significance
This is the least important, and in many ways isn't even important at all to the list. After all, Army-Navy is clearly a rivalry, and it hasn't had National Title significance since movie theaters debuted talkies. Rather than making this one a requirement to a rivalry, this is like Otto the Bus Driver needing drugs at a Pink Floyd Laser Light Show-- it doesn't make the rivalry, it only enhances it. After all, the last thing any rivalry ever wants to become is their region's version of the Civil War. What, you ask, there is a rivalry called the Civil War? Yes, the battle for the state of Oregon between the schools in Eugene and Corvallis. What, you again ask in disbelief and horror, there's a rivalry in the state of Oregon? Yes, and it is apparently huge, and according to most accounts it's a great time. It's a rivalry, but it's just not meaningful to anyone whose area code doesn't start with 503, 541, or 971. This makes it a rivalry, just not a great one. This is the "My So Called Life" effect. Just because a rivalry is critically acclaimed doesn't mean that it matters. If you have to go to the game to get that it's a rivalry, well, congratulations, that's the same marketing campaign the NHL has used to get TV contracts for the past fifteen years.
I spent 10 minutes brainstorming games I remember different media outlets billing as rivalry games, and came up with 40 without much thought. 40? Almost one per state, are you kidding me?! I checked out two random teams fan sites-- Tennessee and Clemson-- and they had a combined listing of 10 rivalry games. This has got to stop. It's time to establish what a rivalry is, and who actually falls into these categories.
Defining a Rivalry
Not every game is a rivalry. Not every conference game is a rivalry. Not every big game is a rivalry. Not every game the pits two teams from the same or adjacent states is a rivalry. Rivalries are special and rarely occur. We insult the true rivalries by using this term so loosely.
1) Both Sides Must Agree this is a Rivalry
This sounds basic, but it is pivotal in deciding what is a rivalry and what is simply a game that you think is big because you hate the other team. Are you listening Texas Tech, Minnesota, Michigan State and everyone else like you? You may hate Texas, Michigan, and Notre Dame respectively, you may have played them for decades, you may stab photos of the opposing coach with disease infected needles, you may even use the opposing teams logo for toilet paper the week of the game. Hate does not necessarily create a rivalry. It's important, but it doesn't create the rivalry. Both sides have to agree that it's a rivalry. That means that the other team must hate you as much as you hate them, which also means that both sides legitimately have a chance to win each year. If you're Missouri and haven't won in Texas in over a century, you cannot call it a rivalry.
For further evidence, let's turn to Saved By the Bell. Particularly, Senior Year (season 4), episode 62, entitled "The Bayside Triangle" (original airdate: 26 Sept. 1992). While I am certain you all also had no life in middle school and recall this beautiful written, 24 minute teen drama, allow me to refresh you: in order to earn her acceptance into the Fashion Institute of Technology-- FYI it is actually a real school in case, like me, you thought Peter Engel Productions made it up-- Lisa has to put on a fashion show for the admissions council. Sensing that shenanigans were certain to ensue, Lisa turns to Zack for help. Zack once again demonstrates his ability to think outside the box by selecting The Max as the location for said show (tragically, Ed Alonzo's magic was once again edited out post-production). Formulaic episode, right? Wrong! Here's the kicker: Zack and Lisa end up making out! Screech, who had strong, strong feelings for Lisa, challenges Zack to a fight and famously rips his shirt. What happens in the fight? I believe you'll find out after you drop $29.95 at Amazon for the complete series collection. Peter Engel: this is not free advertising, hint hint.
Why do I bring this up? The next time Zack went after a girl, do you think he was really worried about Screech? Do you think that he waited for Screech to fall in love with Violet (a young Tori Spelling), and then went after Violet to spite Screech? No. Zack never thought about it again. Want to know why? Because no matter how much he hated Zack, Screech was never a rival in Zack's eyes. Screech could never beat him, Zack wasn't afraid or hated Screech, so it's not a rivalry. Here that Texas Tech fans? You are not AC Slater. You are an awkward, adolescent Dustin Diamond. Pre-porn yes, but also pre-pubescent.
2) There Can Be Only One Rivalry
This is a huge factor in my definition of a rivalry. You cannot have more than one rival. You can have one rival, and then as many number of games that you either hate the opponent or really want to win each year as you want. Here that, basically every school in the SEC right now? Magically, it seems that every time that the Coach, the Host, the Heisman Winner, and the Body show up at an SEC game, amazingly, the home fans start trumpeting what a rivalry the game is. LSU v. Kentucky? Historic! Remember, LSU once beat Kentucky four years ago on a Hail Mary! Vanderbilt v. Arkansas? How could that not conjure up images of National Title games past!? No. I'm only allowed one wife, one religion, and one chance to lose my virginity. So, until I can watch three of my wives make love to each other while I say the Hail Mary during my Bar Mitzvah in order to receive the powers of Hera, you only get one rival. During the Cold War, our only rival was the Soviet Union. Yes, you are only 90 miles away and hate us for our freedom and blockading capabilities, Cuba, but at the end of the day Rocky fought Ivan Drago, not Juan Ramirez.
In fact, if you are a true rivalry, that week before you play your rival almost becomes a season in and of itself. Ultimately, you want your school to go undefeated both seasons: the first ten weeks of the year and in the rivalry game. However, losing during the season will not lead to a coach getting Ty Willinghamed. Losing the rivalry season will--just ask John Cooper's agent. When you hear fans say they'd rather go winless and beat (insert team name here) than go undefeated but lose to (insert same team name here), then you have a rivalry. The best example of this is the Army-Navy game. Ask anyone who went played for, coached for, or attended these schools what is most important to them. Without a doubt, they'll say beating the other one (sorry Air Force, you're Screech in this group of adorable and spunky teens). In fact, this is such a rivalry, that the weights that the players on Army use all off season say "BEAT NAVY" all across them. Same with Navy. That's obsession-- that's a rivalry.
3) It Must Be Historic
Rivalries are timeless. In order to be timeless, your rivalry has to be older than me, and preferably existed before my Dad graduated from high school. This means the game must predate 1970. Sorry, every team in the state of Florida, this means you fall short of the list. Florida State didn't matter until after Bobby "Gee Whiz" Bowden arrived in 1976, Miami didn't matter until Howard Schellenberger arrived in 1979, Florida didn't matter until Steve "I'm a Giant Penis" Spurrier arrived in 1989. Big games? Yes. Games that over the last twenty years have had national title significance? Yes. Old players in wheel chairs with emphysema tanks desperately trying to build up the effort to say to some 18 year old recruit, "What's your record against Miami?" Nope, sorry. Schools like the Florida colleges have to wait until my kids are talking intelligently about football with me to be a rivalry. It's not just Florida, people confuse recent games for rivalries all the time. For years, I used to think that Michigan-Notre Dame was a rivalry. When I started watching in the late 80s, it seemed like a rivalry because every year that two teams were ranked in the top 5 when they met. This match up didn't start until the 80s, however, so even though I will punch Raghib "Crotch Rocket" Ismail ( Step 1: punch in face; Step 2) punch in balls; Step 3) repeat until arm grows tired or police use tasers) if I ever meet him for the pain he caused me as a youth, it's not a rivalry.
Along with this point, you also have to play the team every year for it to be a rivalry. I had to add this one after Texas and Arkansas played this year. Yes, I understand you were conference opponents in the Southwestern Conference back when we as a nation were concerned with "who shot JR." Congratulations. I'm not worried about that anymore nor do I care about your game. I have better things to worry about. Things like whether Tony Soprano died in the final episode (note to self, add spoiler alert at start of previous pop culture reference) and whether Sarah Connor can possibly protect her son in the TV series long enough for him to survive, become Christian Bale, and lead the human race when T4 the movie hits theaters in 2009. Rivalries are played every year. Big games can take a season or decade off every now and again.
4) It Should Have National Significance
This is the least important, and in many ways isn't even important at all to the list. After all, Army-Navy is clearly a rivalry, and it hasn't had National Title significance since movie theaters debuted talkies. Rather than making this one a requirement to a rivalry, this is like Otto the Bus Driver needing drugs at a Pink Floyd Laser Light Show-- it doesn't make the rivalry, it only enhances it. After all, the last thing any rivalry ever wants to become is their region's version of the Civil War. What, you ask, there is a rivalry called the Civil War? Yes, the battle for the state of Oregon between the schools in Eugene and Corvallis. What, you again ask in disbelief and horror, there's a rivalry in the state of Oregon? Yes, and it is apparently huge, and according to most accounts it's a great time. It's a rivalry, but it's just not meaningful to anyone whose area code doesn't start with 503, 541, or 971. This makes it a rivalry, just not a great one. This is the "My So Called Life" effect. Just because a rivalry is critically acclaimed doesn't mean that it matters. If you have to go to the game to get that it's a rivalry, well, congratulations, that's the same marketing campaign the NHL has used to get TV contracts for the past fifteen years.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Who wins the Heisman? How do we decide?
Is it the best player?
The battle-tested winner?
The MVP?
Does anyone really know? As the years go by, it seems that the Heisman trophy has lost its allure. That's not to say fans don't salivate over the though of saying "We have a Heisman winner" and that the honor is at all diminished in the eyes of the players, but something is wrong.
In my opinion, the media is the root of the problem. Analysts, writers and sports casters truly have no true common ground for voting. Many people say that it should be the best player in college football, but then caveat that with bits such as "but he should also be a winner." And then what about the MVP? That's not to say all of these cannot be the same player. In fact, in some years these criteria overlap and the Heisman is nearly unanimous (see Carson Palmer, OJ Simpson and more).
However years such as this year throw people off. The pool of candidates is at the same time loaded and diluted. Let's have a look at the top five against these three different criteria, which for most people would read (in this order, or a slight variation) Graham Harrell, Colt McCoy, Sam Bradford, Tim Tebow, Michael Crabtree.
The best player? Crabtree.
The MVP? McCoy.
The tested winner? Harrell, Crabtree.
Traditionally, the Heisman should go to the best player in college football (Michael Crabtree). And if voters are going to use a cross-section of these three criteria, then I think the obvious choice should still be Michael Crabtree. Now I can hear the roars and boos coming from Gainesville, Austin, Norman and even from half of Lubbock. But I think it's hard to make an argument against him. Here are things you might here:
"Look at (insert Tebow's and Bradford's) numbers right now."
- Tebow and Bradford both have incredible supporting casts. They have been on fire, but look what they have to work with.
"The Gators are the best team and Tebow is their glue."
- Their defense, running game and Tebow are the glue. And the Heisman shouldn't simply go to (arguably) the best player on the team.
"Colt McCoy is the reason Texas is near the top."
- True. Colt has been incredible. He wills his team to come back from games and no other player in the nation can carry a team like he can. But he DID lose. And he is also not the best player. Remember: the Heisman isn't the MVP Award.
"Someone has to throw those balls to Crabtree."
- Yes, and Harrell does that remarkably well. But that throw to beat Texas was not a touchdown pass. Crabtree is a freak, and no other receiver in the nation would have been able to pivot, change direction, break a tackle and score.
So it's obvious who has my vote at this point.
But that wasn't the point of this article. The reason I am writing is because I think we need to remember that winning isn't everything when it comes to the Heisman. In fact, if OU beats TTU this weekend, then we are choosing from a pool of 1-loss guys. And how do we pick then? JuA win against Tech shouldn't catapult Bradford, unless he throws for 10 TDs. After all, Colt McCoy methodically tore apart the OU defense earlier this season. And, of course, Harrell beat McCoy. And Tebow had a weak start to the season and likely has the best supporting cast of everyone.
That is why the media needs to focus less on winning and value, and more on who the best player is. And that has been--and will continue to be--Michael Crabtree.
Brooks' Response:
First of all, the Heisman Trophy has become irrelevant. I'll hold off on that issue for now, however, and focus on the subject matter.
You're right, the problem is a lack of cohesion on what defines the Heisman. It is some combination of Most Outstanding, Most Valuable, and most wins. Even that, however, has been too broad for voters up to this point.
In reality, the Trophy goes to the best QB or RB on a BCS team. Since Ernie Davis' now Hollywood Trademarked win in 1961, only 5 players have won the trophy from what were at the time non-BCS schools. This statistic is misleading, however, since Notre Dame should count as a BCS school and Penn State has since joined the Big 10. That leaves Roger Staubach in 1963, Andre "Detroit Lions' Savior/Not Only Matt Millen Can Ruin Drafts" Ware in 1989, and Ty "Most Awkward Browns Jersey I've Ever Bought" Detmer in 1990 as the only non-BCS winners. At least Tebow showed sophomores could win it, which I suppose is fair, although the benefits in the long run to the game are debateable.
Even more remarkeable is the lack of diversity amongst positions. Since 1960, only four non-QB/RBs have won, and if you count full backs as RBs, it's only three: Tim Brown, Desmond Howard, and Charles Woodson. Woodson's win as a CB is probably the most remarkable, but even then he only became a true candidate when offensive innovator Lloyd Carr chose to use him as a WR in the 1997 campaign. And yes, they did also have to win the National Title that year, which gets you votes. The only other players who came close to adding such diversity to the award were Steve Emtman (DE, finished 4th behind a WR! Wow, way to think outside the box for one night, voters!) in 1991 and Orlando Pace (OT, finished 4th) in 1996. Both Emtman and Pace were drafted well ahead of their college “superiors” in the NFL draft, so I guess there is no way to argue that these guys were either valuable or talented, possibly more so than the winners.
So to get back to who should win this year, we know we have the limitations here and in Hoogs post. Sorry Shonne Green, being second in the NCAA in rushing per game and the only Division 1 player to have at least 100 yards each game isn’t enough to make up for 4 losses. Sorry, Terrence Cody, but Glenn Dorsey showed last year that being a mind blowing talent on the D line to start the season fades after freak knee injuries in SEC play. Sorry Chase Daniel, but there are more reasons that you will not qualify even as a finalist this year than you have chins. Unfortunate, but as Tommy Chung proved, having great career numbers but a lackluster bowl to end your senior year cannot be overcome. I would like to point out, however, that Steve Threet remains a darkhorse candidate. Perhaps later we can define “darkhorse” as well, since it does technically work in the previous sentence.
But why do these votes even matter? What do I care what the beat writer for the Iowa State Cyclones in the Ames Tribune thinks about college football? The answer is I don’t. The best player in college football, in my opinion, will make the biggest impact in the pros. The #1 overall draft pick, it seems to me, is by definition the player most likely to make an impact immediately. All scouts have to base it on is their tape from college, so it’s based on the same visual the writers base their decision on. Only difference: NFL GMs and scouts get fired for being wrong. If you’re wrong as a writer, you get a spot on Around the Horn, ESPN's version of "Hollywood Squares" next to Jay Mariotti and below Woody Paige. Giving the award to players who are so good they can play against even tougher competition will give the award some much needed credibitlity again. After all, something needs to be done to get over the stain of such recent winners as Gino Toretta, Charlie Ward, Rashaan Salaam, Danny Wuerfful, and Chris Weinke. My choice this year, then, is the player getting the most hype as the potential #1 pick come April: Michael Oher, OT from Ole Miss.
Now, Oher will never get any votes. If I have to choose amongst these three, I’ll also choose Crabtree-- for the same reason stated above. He’s got the numbers, he’s got the wins, and he’s got the “play” at the end of the Texas game to define his season (career, really, since he’s gone in three months). McCoy, Tebow and Bradford have had tremendous seasons, but none have both the undefeated season and a single defining moment to match their numbers. That leaves Crabtree and Harrell, since Harrell threw the pass on that play. What does he have over Harrell? Simple: he’s not Kliff Klingsbury 2.0. Crabtree is going to be a stud at the next level, someone that I will want to continue to watch, and someone who has had the best season around this year, which makes him the only Heisman choice. Even if Texas Tech stumbles, he still deserves the award. He will go in the first 5-10 picks because professionals think he is better at football than the other three.
Give him the award this year, but remember, the real award given in New York comes in April, not December.
The battle-tested winner?
The MVP?
Does anyone really know? As the years go by, it seems that the Heisman trophy has lost its allure. That's not to say fans don't salivate over the though of saying "We have a Heisman winner" and that the honor is at all diminished in the eyes of the players, but something is wrong.
In my opinion, the media is the root of the problem. Analysts, writers and sports casters truly have no true common ground for voting. Many people say that it should be the best player in college football, but then caveat that with bits such as "but he should also be a winner." And then what about the MVP? That's not to say all of these cannot be the same player. In fact, in some years these criteria overlap and the Heisman is nearly unanimous (see Carson Palmer, OJ Simpson and more).
However years such as this year throw people off. The pool of candidates is at the same time loaded and diluted. Let's have a look at the top five against these three different criteria, which for most people would read (in this order, or a slight variation) Graham Harrell, Colt McCoy, Sam Bradford, Tim Tebow, Michael Crabtree.
The best player? Crabtree.
The MVP? McCoy.
The tested winner? Harrell, Crabtree.
Traditionally, the Heisman should go to the best player in college football (Michael Crabtree). And if voters are going to use a cross-section of these three criteria, then I think the obvious choice should still be Michael Crabtree. Now I can hear the roars and boos coming from Gainesville, Austin, Norman and even from half of Lubbock. But I think it's hard to make an argument against him. Here are things you might here:
"Look at (insert Tebow's and Bradford's) numbers right now."
- Tebow and Bradford both have incredible supporting casts. They have been on fire, but look what they have to work with.
"The Gators are the best team and Tebow is their glue."
- Their defense, running game and Tebow are the glue. And the Heisman shouldn't simply go to (arguably) the best player on the team.
"Colt McCoy is the reason Texas is near the top."
- True. Colt has been incredible. He wills his team to come back from games and no other player in the nation can carry a team like he can. But he DID lose. And he is also not the best player. Remember: the Heisman isn't the MVP Award.
"Someone has to throw those balls to Crabtree."
- Yes, and Harrell does that remarkably well. But that throw to beat Texas was not a touchdown pass. Crabtree is a freak, and no other receiver in the nation would have been able to pivot, change direction, break a tackle and score.
So it's obvious who has my vote at this point.
But that wasn't the point of this article. The reason I am writing is because I think we need to remember that winning isn't everything when it comes to the Heisman. In fact, if OU beats TTU this weekend, then we are choosing from a pool of 1-loss guys. And how do we pick then? JuA win against Tech shouldn't catapult Bradford, unless he throws for 10 TDs. After all, Colt McCoy methodically tore apart the OU defense earlier this season. And, of course, Harrell beat McCoy. And Tebow had a weak start to the season and likely has the best supporting cast of everyone.
That is why the media needs to focus less on winning and value, and more on who the best player is. And that has been--and will continue to be--Michael Crabtree.
Brooks' Response:
First of all, the Heisman Trophy has become irrelevant. I'll hold off on that issue for now, however, and focus on the subject matter.
You're right, the problem is a lack of cohesion on what defines the Heisman. It is some combination of Most Outstanding, Most Valuable, and most wins. Even that, however, has been too broad for voters up to this point.
In reality, the Trophy goes to the best QB or RB on a BCS team. Since Ernie Davis' now Hollywood Trademarked win in 1961, only 5 players have won the trophy from what were at the time non-BCS schools. This statistic is misleading, however, since Notre Dame should count as a BCS school and Penn State has since joined the Big 10. That leaves Roger Staubach in 1963, Andre "Detroit Lions' Savior/Not Only Matt Millen Can Ruin Drafts" Ware in 1989, and Ty "Most Awkward Browns Jersey I've Ever Bought" Detmer in 1990 as the only non-BCS winners. At least Tebow showed sophomores could win it, which I suppose is fair, although the benefits in the long run to the game are debateable.
Even more remarkeable is the lack of diversity amongst positions. Since 1960, only four non-QB/RBs have won, and if you count full backs as RBs, it's only three: Tim Brown, Desmond Howard, and Charles Woodson. Woodson's win as a CB is probably the most remarkable, but even then he only became a true candidate when offensive innovator Lloyd Carr chose to use him as a WR in the 1997 campaign. And yes, they did also have to win the National Title that year, which gets you votes. The only other players who came close to adding such diversity to the award were Steve Emtman (DE, finished 4th behind a WR! Wow, way to think outside the box for one night, voters!) in 1991 and Orlando Pace (OT, finished 4th) in 1996. Both Emtman and Pace were drafted well ahead of their college “superiors” in the NFL draft, so I guess there is no way to argue that these guys were either valuable or talented, possibly more so than the winners.
So to get back to who should win this year, we know we have the limitations here and in Hoogs post. Sorry Shonne Green, being second in the NCAA in rushing per game and the only Division 1 player to have at least 100 yards each game isn’t enough to make up for 4 losses. Sorry, Terrence Cody, but Glenn Dorsey showed last year that being a mind blowing talent on the D line to start the season fades after freak knee injuries in SEC play. Sorry Chase Daniel, but there are more reasons that you will not qualify even as a finalist this year than you have chins. Unfortunate, but as Tommy Chung proved, having great career numbers but a lackluster bowl to end your senior year cannot be overcome. I would like to point out, however, that Steve Threet remains a darkhorse candidate. Perhaps later we can define “darkhorse” as well, since it does technically work in the previous sentence.
But why do these votes even matter? What do I care what the beat writer for the Iowa State Cyclones in the Ames Tribune thinks about college football? The answer is I don’t. The best player in college football, in my opinion, will make the biggest impact in the pros. The #1 overall draft pick, it seems to me, is by definition the player most likely to make an impact immediately. All scouts have to base it on is their tape from college, so it’s based on the same visual the writers base their decision on. Only difference: NFL GMs and scouts get fired for being wrong. If you’re wrong as a writer, you get a spot on Around the Horn, ESPN's version of "Hollywood Squares" next to Jay Mariotti and below Woody Paige. Giving the award to players who are so good they can play against even tougher competition will give the award some much needed credibitlity again. After all, something needs to be done to get over the stain of such recent winners as Gino Toretta, Charlie Ward, Rashaan Salaam, Danny Wuerfful, and Chris Weinke. My choice this year, then, is the player getting the most hype as the potential #1 pick come April: Michael Oher, OT from Ole Miss.
Now, Oher will never get any votes. If I have to choose amongst these three, I’ll also choose Crabtree-- for the same reason stated above. He’s got the numbers, he’s got the wins, and he’s got the “play” at the end of the Texas game to define his season (career, really, since he’s gone in three months). McCoy, Tebow and Bradford have had tremendous seasons, but none have both the undefeated season and a single defining moment to match their numbers. That leaves Crabtree and Harrell, since Harrell threw the pass on that play. What does he have over Harrell? Simple: he’s not Kliff Klingsbury 2.0. Crabtree is going to be a stud at the next level, someone that I will want to continue to watch, and someone who has had the best season around this year, which makes him the only Heisman choice. Even if Texas Tech stumbles, he still deserves the award. He will go in the first 5-10 picks because professionals think he is better at football than the other three.
Give him the award this year, but remember, the real award given in New York comes in April, not December.
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