Are You Ready Yet?

You think you're excited for the upcoming football season? Feel these nipples!

That is basically how I feel after having a month of actual football news to once again get me excited about college football. While the opening of spring practices and debuts of early enrollees, spring games, and the NFL Draft get our blood flowing, in many ways this is a cruel temptation. Much like the girl with the absent boyfriend who is grinding with you late-night on the dance floor, however, this is just a cruel tease for us. After all, we have nothing to go on until summer practices open in early June. So it's up to our own imagination and anticipation to get us through the darkness of our athletic winter.

With that said, there was a great article today by Andy Staples over at SI.com (our soon to be sister site. All we're waiting on is an offer, SI, and all three of our followers can be yours). Staples details how, basically, every defensive coordinator should fear Terrelle Pryor more than Charlie Sheen's character in "Two and a Half Men" fears committment. And yes, in that analogy, Michigan's defense would be Rose from the show: overweight, obsessive, more than a little jealous of all his conquests recently, and always, always on verge of psychotic breakdown. Scariest line in Staples' piece? "With some time to finally digest the offense and develop a rapport with his blockers, Pryor has learned to stay calm in the pocket. He knows now that while he can do plenty of damage with his legs, his arm can carry the Buckeyes to a Big Ten title and beyond. The 42-yard touchdown pass to Small served as a prime example. The 2008 Pryor probably would have seen the bulge in the pocket and darted through the hole between the right guard and tackle for 15 yards. Instead, the 2009 Pryor stepped into a clear space, planted his feet and threw."

Anyway, the piece got me thinking about what players I'm excited to watch for this season. Now, we all know the three Heisman finalists from last year, Tim Tebow, Sam Bradford, and Colt McCoy are the three major players to watch. After all, they are all locks, barring injury, to get 3 out of the 4 invites back to New York in December. But who else am I looking forward to watching? Pryor is obviously on top of the list of emerging stars, but here are the other players I'm going to build my Saturday's around this fall.

1. Brandon Spikes, LB Florida: This guy almost redefines the term "beast" on the football field. I'm too young to really remember Lawrence Taylor, so I can't make that comparison, but this guy on the college football field looks like Ray Lewis in his prime on Sundays. The guys is simply a beast, almost inhuman-- which makes his "Predator" dreads all the more awesomer. We have waited 12 years to see another defensive player challenge for the Heisman, and he may just be the player. He is going to play on a winning team with no shortage of national TV exposure, has plenty of big play potential in his ability to sack, force fumbles, pick off passes, and score TDs, and not to mention the fact that after Tebow slips without Percy Harvin around him, Spikes will be the new hero in Gainesville.

2. Jevan Snead, QB Ole Miss: It looked as if Snead was going to spend his career known as the guy who lost the Texas starting job to Colt McCoy after transferring to Ole Miss and the offensive vacuum known as Ed Orgeron, but then like Tebow coming down from heaven to make Urban Meyer even more insufferable than he was at Utah, Houston Nutt arrived in Oxford to save this young man's career. Now, some people are saying he could not only contend for the Heisman, but also may be a Top 5 pick in the 2010 draft. My love for him was articulated earlier this year in my bowl game predictions, and I remain more attracted to him than Peter Gammons to his '79 Carlton Fisk Topps Card despite the fact he ruined my predictions. How did he pull that off? First, he played Mike "Yargh, Matey" Leach. Second, he was the show of that game, going 18 of 29 for 292 yards and 3 TDs. Expect more of the same from this man all year long, and for Ole Miss fans to clamor for him to don #18 if he comes back for his senior year.

3. Terrence Cody, DT Alabama: Before a leg injury slowed him down after the LSU game, Cody was the centerpiece of the stellar Crimson Tide defense and seemed to be playing himself into the Top 5 of this year's draft. And that was in his first year at Alabama. Expect "Mount Cody", which I'm pretty sure 3-4 bitches in Tuscaloosa do every Friday night, to come back healthy and hungry (literally and figuratively). A lot of people have made a big deal out of Cody's weight problem based on rumors of him ballooning close to 400 lbs this offseason. To those people, I say you're missing the point. If he's putting on that much weight, that means there's no way he's developed a coke problem despite his recent success!

4. Jeremiah Masoli, QB Oregon: Two years ago, Oregon offensive coordinator Chip Kelly constructed an offensive system around dual threat quarterback Dennis Dixon. Dixon responded by having the most dominating season by a dual threat quarterback not named Vince Young this decade. Dixon would have won the Heisman that year-- look what you caused Dixon! You and your bogus ACL are the origin of this goddamn Tebow media orgy we must all suffer through!-- had he not been injured. By the end of last year, new QB Jeremiah Masoli had emerged as the heir to Dixon's throne. His last three games he totaled more than 300 yards rushing and passing per game and 13 TDs. The guy is going to explode in a conference not known for defense this year. Just wish he played games before 1am EST.

5. Dez Bryant, WR Oklahoma State: Probably the most dominant upper classman wide receiver returning to the college game this fall, I cannot wait to watch him play this season. His quarterback returns in Zak Johnson as well an experienced offensive line around him, so he may even show up in the big games this year! The table should be set for him to have a huge season, followed by huge draft predictions, and ultimately disgrace after shooting himself in the leg with his own pistol that was stashed in the elastic waistband of his sweat pants.

What about you? Who are you most excited to watch this year?